Tech Humor

[Revenant]

Ok, since all the screw up posts keep reappearing, how about one almost related: What's your best story on pulling a prank on coworkers, users, etc? I know most of us have a sense of humor, buried somewhere under layers of griping about customers. My favorite was a variation on the old shock theme. I was working on a system, had my hands in the cabling, and another tech walks over and for some reason, turned the thing on. (Since I had it unplugged, I had no worries) So on a whim, I started shaking and jerking and man, the look on his face was classic. He was scrambling trying to hit the power cord, unplug the machine, whatever. I laughed at him for an hour. Needless to say, he never did that again. http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/biggrin.gif

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What's this button d--

[klenard]

I put the Shockwave program "Expedite.exe" (Flashes "I am Gay" in pink and black) on my bosses computer. whenever he got back on it, It starts flashing and making a "whoop-whoop" sound. it was soo funny watching him try to turn it off.

[Revenant]

'nother good one: At the last shop I worked at, I modified one of the salesman's shutdown screens to say, instead of "It is safe to Shut down your computer," to Error code 5635, It is NOT safe to shut down your computer!" It was funny to see him come running into the tech area- my computers broken!

and then, there was this one time, at band camp...

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What's this button d--

[klenard]

Revenant, you have to show me how to do that one.......

[CobraTekMax]

Heh heh heh! First off, let me say that my boss and I get along great. He's like a brother, father and best friend all in one. But he's NOT a computer guy. He can sell an ice maker to an Eskimo, but he knows only the very basics of how a computer actually works. So, needless to say, he relies on me for pretty much every thing.

I once painstakingly created a fake error dialog box that stated "ID10T Error! Windows Update has detected that you may be running a pirated version of Windows 2000. Another machine using this Product ID code has logged onto the Windows Update site at this time. Please click yes to erase the contents of this drive." "No" and the close button were both greyed out. Saved it as a bitmap, and made it my boss's wallpaper. It was beautiful. Dead center on the middle of the screen, and looked completely legit, especially since he always uses a plain black background. I knew he was coming in to do some paper work the next morning, so it would be the first thing he saw when he turned his monitor on. Just for giggles, I left my phone off the hook, and turned off my cell phone and pager. Finally became "available" to take calls after I figured he was there screwing around with it for about a half hour.

Sure enough, my cell phone wasn't on for more than a minute when it reported 20 missed calls, and more than a dozen voice mails from him. And 37 pages on my pager. He finally finally reached me, and the first thing he said was "Are you f*cking with me?!"
What are you talking about, I ask? "I've been trying to reach you for almost an hour! I need you down here right now! There's this message on my computer -" I wish I could have played it cool for a bit longer to string him along, but the fear and tension in his voice brought my mean streak, and I started laughing my head off. "Oh, you little son of a *****! You just remember, payback is hell!"

It's great to know that you're irreplacable. http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/smile.gif

Oh, BTW, has anyone ever seen the Flash file "careless whispers"? Run it, and a redneck loudly announces - "HEY EVERYBODY! I'M WATCHIN' PORNO OVER HERE!" That's another good one.

[Revenant]

Klenard: to change the shutdown screen:
In 95/98, there should be a file in the C:\windows directory called either logo.sys or logos.sys. (I can't recall specifically, and I'm on NT right now...) They may be hidden. Change the extension on them to bmp and you can view them in paint or whatever. You can modify them however you like, but just keep pixel width/height the same as the original files, and the rename them to their original .sys name. The startup screen is in the root (C:\) hidden as logo.sys. Modify them how you like, but remember: don't feed them after midnig... (s$*t, wrong warning) Always keep them the same hieght and width as the original. Plus make backups of the originals, just in case.

As a side note, someone else did this one to one of my friends, he was at the school computer lab so this really got him good. Someone sent him an EXE file. He ran it. It popped up a dialogue box that said: "do you have a small penis? The no button would run away if you tried to click on it, so he eventually conceded and hit yes... The next screen was loud noise, and bright red large letters that said something to the effect of "This Man Has A Small Penis" he couldn't get out of it so it ran its course and made fun of him for like a minute. The best part is, he's a jock... heheheh... The computer lab had some fun at his expense...

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What's this button d--

[Danrak]

I think the best one for me so far is when Back Orifice came aout before anyone knew about it. Lets say that all the computers on the network had cd draws opening up randomly, program starting and closing by themselves, and more.
I've also took a snap shot of a bosses computer screen, moved all icons I could on desktop (with a little help from regedit) to a folder, then made the screen shot i took earlier as a background and watched him try and open up his programs.

Changed startup and shutdown screens to say things like "Now formating c:", "Computer is infected with XYZ virus, please call for help".

I'm currently working on a way to get sounds to play on every computer on our network at once or in a randomly. I would also love to to make it so when a tech turns a computer out a puff of smoke comes out, but that might be going a bit too far.
Not really computer related but I love saying "No I will NOT touch you there" loud enough so the guys out front will hear.

.·°Danrak°·.
The box said "Requires Windows 95 or better" so I installed Linux

[This message has been edited by Danrak (edited September 15, 2000).]

[MAYHEM]

Let's just say that between testing modems by repeatedly dialing tha stores main line with Hyper-Terminal and accessing th A drives on both POSs, I keep the sales staff on there toes. Had one salesperson convinced for months that the store was haunted by a Mafia hit victim buried under the concrete floor.

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Who the hell is General Protection and why is he messing with my comuter?

[MAYHEM]

Another one not exactly related to computers:

One of my techs had been complaining that people were calling his house all through the night looking for someone who he never met. He later found out the phone co. had crossed some lines. But not before I could take advantage of his plight.

After listening to his ranting for an hour or so, I excused myself to go next door for coffee. I conspired with the manager of the bread shop. Twenty minutes after I return Evan is still ranting about people calling him at 4AM looking for "Lori" and wanting to know who he is and what he did with "Lori".

Then Suzi, from next door calls and Evan answers the phone, she says, "Hi, my name is Lori, do I have any mesages?"

The look on Evans face was PRICELESS! And the stuttering response of, "Wh-WHat... Wh-What???.... D D D Do you know how many people have called me looking for you?" I completely lost it, took ten minutes to stop laughing enough to get off the floor.

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Who the hell is General Protection and why is he messing with my comuter?

[RLD]

I have this exe file that opens the CD tray whenever it is executed. I put this on a friends computer and added it into the scheduled tasks to run at irritating times. When I went to laugh at them, I discovered that they had put masking tape around the whole machine to stop the CD tray from coming out. The tray was never the same after that - sort of shaky.

[pcshark]

Back in the DOS days, when you booted to a prompt, it was fun to load ansi.sys in the Config.sys, and then set the text color to black. Black text on black screen = looks like it's busted to me! What was really funny was that you'd sit down and say "Let me take a look." Type CLS and then enter, and the white text reappears. Then you go "Looks fine to me." And it would be, until the next time they rebooted. Good times, the DOS days (-:

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R. Bret Walker, CNE

Wondering what videos to rent this weekend? Check out The People's Reviews (http://www.geocities.com/pcshark/b-e), movie reviews written for the people and by the people.

[RoboG4]

Several times I have changed the system.ini line shell=Explorer.exe to shell=progman.exe, effectively bringing up the windows 3.1 interface. The look on peoples faces when they can't find the start menu. http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/smile.gif

[TazNet]

Originally posted by Danrak:
I think the best one for me so far is when Back Orifice came aout before anyone knew about it. Lets say that all the computers on the network had cd draws opening up randomly, program starting and closing by themselves, and more.
I've also took a snap shot of a bosses computer screen, moved all icons I could on desktop (with a little help from regedit) to a folder, then made the screen shot i took earlier as a background and watched him try and open up his programs.

Changed startup and shutdown screens to say things like "Now formating c:", "Computer is infected with XYZ virus, please call for help".

I'm currently working on a way to get sounds to play on every computer on our network at once or in a randomly. I would also love to to make it so when a tech turns a computer out a puff of smoke comes out, but that might be going a bit too far.
Not really computer related but I love saying "No I will NOT touch you there" loud enough so the guys out front will hear.

.·°Danrak°·.
The box said "Requires Windows 95 or better" so I installed Linux

[This message has been edited by Danrak (edited September 15, 2000).]

There is a remote admin program like Back Orafice called NetBus. It has the ability to play wave files on the remote PC. You can even turn the volume up and down too. Try it...Lots of fun. I'm still working on the smoke. I want to see that one too.

[pcshark]

Just remembered another one from the DOS/Win3x days. I was messing around in assembler and I wrote a little 9 byte com file that warm-booted the PC from the command line. Well, I copied it onto a co-worker's PC, and just to be sure he saw it, because I was sure he'd love to see it, I put it in his Windows directory and called it win.com. So every time he tried to get into Windows, it rebooted his PC. Oh, the barrage of obscenities that flew from his cubicle that day! He musta stripped the PC down and put it back together twice before I finally, with tears in my eyes, told him what I did.

The last thing I remember was the keyboard flying toward my head...

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R. Bret Walker, CNE

Wondering what videos to rent this weekend? Check out The People's Reviews (http://www.geocities.com/pcshark/b-e), movie reviews written for the people and by the people.

[Danrak]

Originally posted by TazNet:
There is a remote admin program like Back Orafice called NetBus. It has the ability to play wave files on the remote PC. You can even turn the volume up and down too. Try it...Lots of fun. I'm still working on the smoke. I want to see that one too.

Yup. played with netbus also. There is another program called girlfriend which is supposed to do the same thing, but it's picked up by virus scanners way to easily.
Another fun thing to do is create an icon on the desktop that shutsdown or restarts the computer. I had fun with that one shen my friend worked at circuit city. Used to make the buttons say, "WARNING do not touch", and of course they did.


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.·°Danrak°·.
The box said "Requires Windows 95 or better" so I installed Linux

[This message has been edited by Danrak (edited September 19, 2000).]

[WickedTech]

My favorite, though not mine, was whena friend placed an EXE file that demos the effect of a virus in another guys Startup folder. He booted and up came what looked like Windows Explorer with a msgbox asking if you wanted to delete all files? Of course it has all the cancel options greyed out and the guy hits Yes. The look on his face as the program goes through and appears to delete everything on his drive was priceless.

The most evil that I've done personally, was to do a screen shot of the desktop, make it the wallpaper, move the icons, do another screenshot, etc... Until the entire screen was filled with the same icons, then I rearranged the icons to be hidden ontop of the wallpaper, moved the start bar to the top of the screen and shorted the start bar to it's minimum height. Did I mention I did this to every station I sat at in my company's training room? http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/wink.gif

[cyberhh]

STONED virus. It did nothing xcept stop your machine with the message "Your machine is now stoned"
quite funny and easily removed.

[FU_MAN]

Hey Danrak, I like the shutdown icon on the desktop, I have done the same thing but changed the icon to look like theIE icon. Pure toture for an inexperienced internet fanatic!!

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I do not wish to have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.

[drewber]

let me count the ways......

1. Made a batch file and put it in hte start up folder....this is what it looked like

c:\windows\rundll.exe user32.exe,restartwindows

set the pif to run minimized and close on exit, then pc endlessly rebooted unless you went into safe mode


2. edit autoexec.bat
add about 500 carraidge returns...add a single line
@label c: cursed

every time my boss rebooted he relabeld his hard drive, after he rebooted it came back. he swore it was a virus. Scanned it with every virus scanner he could find, just before i could tell him that i did it he did the old fdisk /mbr
fdisk delte all partions, recreate and format.

after i saw the monitor saying format 1% complete, never told him about it.

3. Renamed all of the DLL files to DII
that was funny

almost forgot, the best one

4. edit msdos.sys bootmenu=1
bootmenudefualt=5 (command prompt only
bootmenudelay=0

added the following to autoexec.bat
@cls
@mode 80
@prompt NO ROM BIOS $_ SYSTEM HAULTED

hehe my boss formated again...... last time i ever played a joke on him.


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hmm win 98 command prompt
lets try c:\>/con/con
illegal what?
echo label c: cursed >>c:\autoexec.bat

[Revenant]

In Response to Drewber:

What's a "Boot me nude fault"?
I know what a "boot me nude lay" is...
http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/biggrin.gif
heheheh... just couldn't resist... You gotta love funny misinterpreted function calls.

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What's this button d--

[Snock]

Similar to one of the posts above, I once wrote a simple little Pascal program as a wee lad that imitated a DOS prompt. No matter what you typed in (except for the secret exit password), the screen would always say "bad command or file name" just like DOS. I wrote it so that you couldn't get out of it with ctrl-break or anything either. I'd copy it to someone's hard drive, call it from autoexec.bat with echo off, and reboot. Funny as hell, I tell you. People would keep typing in the same commands 5 or 6 times apeice even though nothing ever happened.

Of course, a knowledgeable person would clean boot and look at the autoexec.bat, but they were the minority - and even then it usually fooled them for a minute or two.

On a related note, SysInternals (http://www.sysinternals.com) has a cool little freeware screensaver that looks like a Windows 2000 hang and restart. It's one of the funniest things that I've ever seen.

[PitaBred]

I've done the before, snock. In our computer labs here at school, we tend to get a lot of un-technical people. I was having fun with NT one day, and decided to mess with one of my friends. I went to the command prompt and typed "net send COMPUTERNAME We're watching you, Rob" and sent it... saw him look left, right, behind him, then he quickly shut off his computer and didn't go to that class for WEEKS. He apparently didn't notice which computer/user sent that message to him. Hehe. He got miffed and then (thankfully)laughed when I told him what I did. He's bigger than I am... it was priceless, though http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/smile.gif

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Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of

[corelogik]

Originally posted by Revenant:
Klenard: to change the shutdown screen:
In 95/98, there should be a file in the C:\windows directory called either logo.sys or logos.sys. (I can't recall specifically, and I'm on NT right now...) They may be hidden. Change the extension on them to bmp and you can view them in paint or whatever. You can modify them however you like, but just keep pixel width/height the same as the original files, and the rename them to their original .sys name. The startup screen is in the root (C:\) hidden as logo.sys. Modify them how you like, but remember: don't feed them after midnig... (s$*t, wrong warning) Always keep them the same hieght and width as the original. Plus make backups of the originals, just in case.

As a side note, someone else did this one to one of my friends, he was at the school computer lab so this really got him good. Someone sent him an EXE file. He ran it. It popped up a dialogue box that said: "do you have a small penis? The no button would run away if you tried to click on it, so he eventually conceded and hit yes... The next screen was loud noise, and bright red large letters that said something to the effect of "This Man Has A Small Penis" he couldn't get out of it so it ran its course and made fun of him for like a minute. The best part is, he's a jock... heheheh... The computer lab had some fun at his expense...




i found the logo.sys file and it changes the start up splash screen but it didnt do anything to the exit splash screen where is this file at ?



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CoreLogik - "I Control Your MotherBoard"
DigitalSolutions (http://www.Dreamsoft.com/pages/digitalsolutions)

[3fingersalute]

logo.sys is the startup image

logow.sys is the please wait while your computer shuts down image

logos.sys is the it is now safe to turn off your computer message (But you don't see it anymore on ATX machines, they shut therselves off)

logo.sys goes in the root directory

logos.sys and logow.sys go in the c:\windows directory

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WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO TODAY?......Not that it matters, because Micrsoft will crash on the way there!!!

[3fingersalute]

Originally posted by klenard:
I put the Shockwave program "Expedite.exe" (Flashes "I am Gay" in pink and black) on my bosses computer. whenever he got back on it, It starts flashing and making a "whoop-whoop" sound. it was soo funny watching him try to turn it off.


I've been trying to dig up a copy of that file to load up as a joke on somebody's machine, if anybody has it, please email it to techsupport@knousecomputer.com

Thanks!!


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WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO TODAY?......Not that it matters, because Micrsoft will crash on the way there!!!

[klenard]

ok dood, i am sending it your way.

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You have to be smarter than what you are working with.

[Cytek]

I got an XXX pic off teh internet and made it the background of my managers computer. I streched the image to make it fill the whole screen. then I I did a print screen of the desktop and pasted it into paint. I then set that image as the desktop and used policy editor to remove most of the desktop icons then hid the remaining icons and the start bar below the lowar edge of the screen.
his monitor was in plain view of everyone. when he came into work and turned on his computer he saw the background tried to click on start tried to get into to change it nothing worked.. manual poweroff (thinking the machine was locked) only brought back the same thing! All smiles that day!


Originally posted by Revenant:
Ok, since all the screw up posts keep reappearing, how about one almost related: What's your best story on pulling a prank on coworkers, users, etc? I know most of us have a sense of humor, buried somewhere under layers of griping about customers. My favorite was a variation on the old shock theme. I was working on a system, had my hands in the cabling, and another tech walks over and for some reason, turned the thing on. (Since I had it unplugged, I had no worries) So on a whim, I started shaking and jerking and man, the look on his face was classic. He was scrambling trying to hit the power cord, unplug the machine, whatever. I laughed at him for an hour. Needless to say, he never did that again. http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/biggrin.gif

[iateyourcat]

Shrink wrapped a guys truck. Got pictures somewhere..

[klenard]

I once shrink wrapped a co-worker to a pallet and put him 30 feet into a rack and left him there for about 10 minutes. I think my boss is still super pissed about that one.

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You have to be smarter than what you are working with.

[orbiter dictvm]

I was in an expensive NT Administrators training class with some co-workers. I noticed that one of the admins in the class wasn't paying attention, They were actually playing games! I hate to see the company spend over a grand on classes only to have the student blow it. So at the end of the day I changed the icon associations for the games to an exe that cranks up the voume and shouts "Hey everybody, I'm watchin' porn over here! Woo Hoo!!". it wasn't ten minutes into the class when it goes off totally ebarassing the student and ensuring their full class attention. (until after lunch when they tried to run paintbrush heh....heh..)

[FessendenTechnologies]

We had a tech that worked for Zenith for 30+ Years and he told a story about a supervisor that had a habit of coming over and picking things up off his bench and walking off with it. So one day he charged up a cap and placed it in reach and sure enough the supervisor came along and picked it up! ;-)
Needless to say he got his hair curled.

Another good trick is to glue a quarter to the floor and watch as someone tries to pick it up.

In the old days when metal lunch pails were common, you could take Epoxy and glue the lids shut. ;-)

[Grider]

I changed the shell on my dad's Windows9x PC from explorer.exe to progman.exe one day before I left his house one day. http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/smile.gif Turned it off and started on my way back to my house. About 35 minutes after I left my cell phone starts ringing. "Son, I think I have a virus or something. My computer looks like 3.1 instead of 95." I go "WHOA! I've seen that one before. Had to format the system to get rid of it...." He goes through 5 virus scans and comes up with nothing....left him hanging until 5 pm the next day before he left his office. He was going home to format the system. He is still ticked at me for that :-)

[biamp system super woofer]

Originally posted by RoboG4:
Several times I have changed the system.ini line shell=Explorer.exe to shell=progman.exe, effectively bringing up the windows 3.1 interface. The look on peoples faces when they can't find the start menu. http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/smile.gif

I'v done that to a friend of mine except with SOL.EXE
it is cool to because it comes on at boot up and as soon as he exits the game that's it. the only thing he can do is shutdown. the really cool thing it that it works in safe mode to. "Mabey you need to win a game before it lets you in..." 15min later (Vegas style) "maby you need to win 5 in a row or somthing like that" (i can bee so cruel)


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Im not the only person that picks paswords from what i see at my work station..

[biamp system super woofer]

Did you know that there is a Reg hack that will create a banner that comes up just before the logon screen?

HKeyLocalMachine \ SOFTWARE \ Microsoft \ Windows \ CurrentVersion \ WinLogon

Create a new string value called LegalNoticeCaption and type in your message.
this is your box header
Create another string and call it LegalNoticeText and enter the dialog you want in your box

the message has a single OK box that one needs to click on before the system will allow you to continue

My friend now gets reminded everytime he boots up that he owes me money....
When i get payed the message goes away.
Moowa ha ha ha ha..

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Im not the only person that picks paswords from what i see at my work station..

[thirdfey]

ALl I can say is VNC. Take full control of someone's system while their working on it is great, nothing like grabbing a salesguy computer while he's trying to make a sale and have kiddie porn appear in his web browser.

At my new job there is this guy that litens to country on web radio, so everytime he walks away from his computer I turn it off or shutdown his computer. Its great.

[Quasited]

Mine was a little different than most and needed the web to help.
Two April 1s ago, I had found that anoying "Hampsterdance" web site. Well I figured out how to set up my bosses computer so that the site came up automatically, minimized. I turned up the speakers and shutdown his machine. The next morning he walked into his office and tunred on his machine. After logging on the machine just started blaring that song out over and over again. I had told others what I had done so they had been waiting patiently and started laughing when it came on. What made it even funnier is he thought it was a one time deal (had shut down explorer and all) and then had a fatal exception error (this one was not planned). When he rebooted I found out just how much he doesn't know about computers, because he spent a good two hours trying to figure out that I had just put the website in his startup folder. http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/smile.gif
Chat later

[Vigilante]

I once added a "chipmunk chirping sound" app to my bosses autoexec file. Every few hours he would ask "did you hear that?". Turns out he went and bought a new hearing aid because of it....

[This message has been edited by Vigilante (edited September 20, 2000).]

[Prik]

One time at school ( college ) in class we ware messing with dos... =X So I made the autoexec.bat file change the prompt to "Bad command or file name." heh so they prompt would just be :

Bad command or file name.

lol Now it looks like its screwed. So I summoned the admin and asked for help. He couldnt figure it... LOL Thats my prank for the day.


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Prompt Bad command or file name.

[machinex]

I think my best was when a co-worker and i went on the roof of our 4 story building and waited for our boss to come in. We worked night shift so there was noone else around. Anyway we locked all the elevators to the forth floor, and armed both stairwells with waterballoons knowing that was his only way up. When he finally arrived he was bombarded with waterballons from the roof of the building, all but one missed. So we both ran down to the stairwells on either side of the building and, well... he wound up having to go home and change.

[ledrichard]

Have you guys ever done this?

When your fellow techs are sitting around and staring at the monitor while defrag or data backup do there business, go up and (if comp. is non-ATX) press the power switch but dont let go.

Instead replace your finger with the lazy techs' and walk away. He/she will not be able to leave because if they do the machine will turn off. It really pisses them off especially if they need to go wee-wee!

HEHEHEHE!!!

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hey its me again!

[CobraTekMax]

ledrichard, I LOVE it! It's so beautiful in it's simplicity. I'm definately going to have to do that to someone at work in the near future. http://www.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/wink.gif

[LabRat]

To pay back whoever kept messing with my workstation settings at home, I changed the shutdown sound to a wave file of the star trek computer from next generation that states " Self-Destruct sequence initiated" and the shutting down screen read "Windows has been removed from this computer"

Came home to a dinner with all my favorites and a strangely amorous wife ;-)

Only other stunt close to that was putting a .wav file in my boss' start up folder that would greet him at start up with a very suductive "Hello there Big boy", Unfortunately his wife turned on the computer to work on company books that night <ouch>

[skut]

i had an ADA class at college last year. so id edit the autoexec.bat to say "This program is not intended for a DOS/Win 9.x Platform." after rebooting a few of the computers it was in effect. people would write their programs and couldnt understand what they did wrong. as of the end of the semester no one had fixed it. >shrug<

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prompt$p$g [dos = elite]

[Danrak]

Anyone ever seen the program that flips the screen upside down until you click on something? Place that in the Run section in the registery. You should get some fun out of that one.

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.·°Danrak°·.
The box said "Requires Windows 95 or better" so I installed Linux

[3fingersalute]

Originally posted by ledrichard:
Have you guys ever done this?

When your fellow techs are sitting around and staring at the monitor while defrag or data backup do there business, go up and (if comp. is non-ATX) press the power switch but dont let go.

Instead replace your finger with the lazy techs' and walk away. He/she will not be able to leave because if they do the machine will turn off. It really pisses them off especially if they need to go wee-wee!

HEHEHEHE!!!




The only problem with that is when you push in the switch on the AT case, you can let it out and click it back on superfast and it will not even shutdown.....trust me, I have done this many a times, started to turn one off, then realized I didn't want to! So, if the person is quick enough, your prank could be reversed easily!


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WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO TODAY?......Not that it matters, because Micrsoft will crash on the way there!!!

[klenard]

Hey 3FingerSalute, did that program i sent you work for ya?

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You have to be smarter than what you are working with.

[gotbyk]

We run mainly WinNT/Win2K at work. If someone walks away without locking their PC it is time to have fun, to include:

A. Various revealing e-mails from that person to other office members.

B. Screenshot of whatever they are working on. Set it as the wallpaper then lock the machine and drag the unlock window to the bottom corner. They come back and click, then click some more... it is great!

[Kit]

I sent a co-worker of mine on a hunt for a "cable-strecher." He didn't catch on for 15 min. After we all laughed and told him there was no such thing. He said that there was and we were just #$%*ing with him. He wasn't that bright if I remember

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Want a faster system, just change that little switch on the power supply to 230. It'll double your power. By the way, where is that smoke coming from?

[sprkymrk]

The best one I did was the most recent. A class I was taking for IIS was on a break for dinner. Everyone would go next door to grab a bite to eat but I stayed behind to do a little web surfing to take advantage of the T-1 connection. I noticed that my friend left his machine unlocked (NT) and was downloading some MP3's from Napster.
I took a screenshot of it, and in Paint edited it a little by graying stuff out and added a box with the follwing message: FBI WARNING, You are illegally downloading copyrighted material. If you continue to do so, you will be traced and prosecuted etc. etc...
I then set it as his wallpaper and went into policy editor and hid his desktop icons. I had to reboot his machine, but fortunatly his was a BDC on my domain with mine being the PDC. I then changed his password.
When he came back he really freaked because it appeared his computer was locked up by the FBI. He restarted it with a comment like "I'll fix them.." and really freaked when he couldn't log on (password changed). I offered to help him by giving him a new user account and password. Boy he really freaked when it still came back up with the FBI thing. He started showing everyone in the class what the FBI did. Of course a couple unwitting classmates jumped in with thier own stories of FBI computer hacking which really added to the fun. Some made comments like "If the FBI ever did that to me I would blah blah blah..."
He tried in vain to fix it for about 10 minutes and 2-3 more reboots. Then while he was away taking a bathroom break I went back into policy editor and changed it back and got rid of the wallpaper. He came back while I was just finishing up and was actually greatful I was able to "fix" his PC. He still doesn't know it was a joke.

[Renée]

An oldie but goodie (though not computer related). I get a little kick out of it...

Leave a phone message for your favorite coworker from a person named "Myra Maines" and put the phone number of a funeral home or crematorium. I'm sure the morticians get tired of it, but it's a great joke if you pull it on someone who's never heard it.

They pick up the phone and dial...person answers...they say, "Hi, yes...I'd like to speak with Myra Maines, please."

Say it out loud to get the effect.



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GeekGirl
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[furlong47]

Probably the funniest was when my (ex-)boyfriend and I were running PCanywhere on our systems so we could use them from each other's dorm rooms...while he was over at my place he got on his computer remotely and turned on Winamp, turned the volume up to full and let it run...when he got home his poor roomate told him that something was wrong with his computer, it was going crazy and blasting music all by itself...hehe

[oldman]

took a short vacation on a weekend
took an old dos program called backtalk and setup it up to be the first in the autoexec.bat, would just go to prompt, if you typed anything in it would just tell you it was sleeping or go away and after awhile it would say it will format your hard drive

the bosses wife never did forgive me, she was totally ignorant of computers, and freaked out

was fired about 2 weeks later

best thing that ever happened to me

[Schui]

I dun a few like these.

Created a shortcut on desktop c:\windows\rundll.exe user.exe,exitwindows and made the icon for Word..... everytime my boss tried to run word, it shutdown. Also printscreened the desktop, saved as backdrop, and using tweakui, removed all the desktop icons, and hid the startmenu. (repointed start>programs to c:\windows\temp!) Of course, it looked like the icons were all there, but you couldn't click on any of them! he he

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[Jgold47]

kinda cheesy but i remeber a real cute gal, who's boyfriend put a huge text love letter in her start up and couldnt get rid of it since she was an idiot.... only problem was that they had broken up, and it wasnt so cute anymore http://forums.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/frown.gif however, something like that can be real hard to get rid of if it is coming from the registry

[Jgold47]

mabyee we need another forum to teach each other how to do these, some of these are really good

[mikesorensen]

Teach me! Teach me! How do I do that one?


Originally posted by Danrak:
Yup. played with netbus also. There is another program called girlfriend which is supposed to do the same thing, but it's picked up by virus scanners way to easily.
Another fun thing to do is create an icon on the desktop that shutsdown or restarts the computer. I had fun with that one shen my friend worked at circuit city. Used to make the buttons say, "WARNING do not touch", and of course they did.

[mikesorensen]

i worked at walmart a LOOONNNNNNNGGGGG time ago and we used to shrink wrap managers cars as well. Can I see the pics??? Email me or post them!

Originally posted by iateyourcat:
Shrink wrapped a guys truck. Got pictures somewhere..



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Do one thing everyday that scares you!

[TheLow1]

I bubble wrapped a guys motorcycle with a industrial roll and few rolls of duct tape. Wow I'll never forget his face. He thought someone stole his bike. He walked past it and never recognised it.

[Mr.James]

When my company was emptying the comp graveyard a coworker changed out of his shirt/tie/suit into a track suit. We then wrapped up his clothes and sent them via a courier to our largest contractor at the other end of the country. He actually saw the funny side.

Also when I was at College (good old dos days) I wrote a small little program that played a random beep every time a key was pressed. I called it DOSKEY.COM, changed the time & date stamp and file size to match the real DOSKEY.
Next I copied it to a boot disk with an autoexec.bat that simply copied my file over the original DOSKEY.

After this I went into the programming lab one lunch time. 30 or so PCs with only DOS and Dos based C, Pascal etc. All of which loaded DOSKEY from the autoexec. I booted every single PC with my boot disk.

I told the rest of my class and we were all stood waiting outside a room 1 floor below for a lecture. When the female programming teacher came storming downstairs into the staff room and we just cought a scream of "It sounds like a F***ING SPACESHIP in there."

Needless to say the uproar from the rest of my class earned me a two week suspension.

Worked Like A Dream http://forums.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/biggrin.gif

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Cheers,
Mr.James

[Mr.James]

Me and a bunch of lads picked up a college lecturers car and moved it from the carpark out into a nearby field and rolled it onto it's roof.

"Pick up a car?" I here you say. Well not a real car but an automobile none the less.

Take a look at this :-
www.satellitecentral.freeserve.co.uk (http://www.satellitecentral.freeserve.co.uk)

THE biggest joke in automobile history!

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Cheers,
Mr.James

[Macgyver_111]

if you let go and hit again fast enough it does not always go off


Originally posted by ledrichard:
Have you guys ever done this?

When your fellow techs are sitting around and staring at the monitor while defrag or data backup do there business, go up and (if comp. is non-ATX) press the power switch but dont let go.

Instead replace your finger with the lazy techs' and walk away. He/she will not be able to leave because if they do the machine will turn off. It really pisses them off especially if they need to go wee-wee!

HEHEHEHE!!!

[Jvaguy]

all i do is take pix of co employess working and make stupid quotes and things about them and post them for all to see one day i got the general manager (with his mouth open and i put ahh my store all this other stuff) and the district manager make a sneak visit and say the pix posted and i was like im dead .. and he laughed for a half hour about them .. (too bad he didnt know i got him and his pix was posted for 3 days) its also a nice way to take your pains out on people who annoy you

[Draggar]

Originally posted by drewber:
1. Made a batch file and put it in hte start up folder....this is what it looked like

c:\windows\rundll.exe user32.exe,restartwindows

2. edit autoexec.bat
add about 500 carraidge returns...add a single line
@label c: cursed

3. Renamed all of the DLL files to DII
that was funny

4. edit msdos.sys bootmenu=1
bootmenudefualt=5 (command prompt only
bootmenudelay=0

added the following to autoexec.bat
@cls
@mode 80
@prompt NO ROM BIOS $_ SYSTEM HAULTED


Man, I should have done that to my old supervisor! He would have loved it! (And probabally would have given me a raise for fixing it!)


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Where are we going and why are we in this handbasket?

[This message has been edited by Draggar (edited October 27, 2000).]

[Faldarian]

Hehe, did the I am Gay thing here... did the "I'm surfing porn" one too =)

Worst I did was to another one of my coworkers who doesn't know much about Windows... he keeps all kinds of crap on his desktop so when he left one day I dragged all his programs into his Start menu so they all the programs he had on his desktop booted next time he turned on his computer =)


And I changed the font size, and the resolution, and enabled sticky keys, and switched him to a left handed mouse...and stole the ball from his mouse, and all the spare ones around, and turned all the pictures on his desk upside down, and stole his name plate and replaced it with a different one...etc. etc.

[Macgyver_111]

I should not have done this, but i did.
Using a net scanner i found people onn the net who had there drives shared.

I went ina nd edited this system.ini file so the shell would be progman.exe

Or winmine.exe

I realy should not have done thgis but i did.

So sorry.

[Macgyver_111]

I should not have done this, but i did.
Using a net scanner i found people onn the net who had there drives shared.

I went ina nd edited this system.ini file so the shell would be progman.exe

Or winmine.exe

I realy should not have done thgis but i did.

So sorry.

[Macgyver_111]

Can you send me tht file?

Originally posted by Vigilante:
I once added a "chipmunk chirping sound" app to my bosses autoexec file. Every few hours he would ask "did you hear that?". Turns out he went and bought a new hearing aid because of it....

[This message has been edited by Vigilante (edited September 20, 2000).]

[jimmr13]

When I was going to School (for my mcse) we had a know it all who always had a smart *** remark for everyone, while on the network my instructor and I created a little batch file
and I kind of sent it to his computer.At break time the instructor told every one to log off and take a break he and the class took a long break when we returned we all loged on to the network, Rays (the smart ***) computer started then wiped his C: drive all by it self http://forums.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/biggrin.gif He kept his mouth shut after that. I still can't belive he was the only one at the school who didn't know what I did. http://forums.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/smile.gif

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If all else fails read the directions !

[SavagePenguin]

I came up with this idea yesterday while trying one of the dozen free internet consols at the local mall.

1) Get a dozen cute pictures (fluffy bunnies, pupies, kittens, etc.).

2) Get a dozen filthy pictures.

3) Make animated GIFs. Set a cute picture to display for 3 minutes, followed by a filthy picture.

4) Upload the animated GIF's to your favorite free web server.

5) Go to the mall and bring up one of the GIF's on each consol.

6) Watch as old ladies flock to the cute imagery.

The rest is pretty self-explanitory.

[Grider]

Originally posted by SavagePenguin:
I came up with this idea yesterday while trying one of the dozen free internet consols at the local mall.

1) Get a dozen cute pictures (fluffy bunnies, pupies, kittens, etc.).

2) Get a dozen filthy pictures.

3) Make animated GIFs. Set a cute picture to display for 3 minutes, followed by a filthy picture.

4) Upload the animated GIF's to your favorite free web server.

5) Go to the mall and bring up one of the GIF's on each consol.

6) Watch as old ladies flock to the cute imagery.

The rest is pretty self-explanitory.

ROFLMAO....thats good.

[EvilKlown]

Hmmm, Well.... I got on IE or Netscape and went to some stupid page noone would ever need. Took a screenshot. Made that image my wallpaper, turned on active desktop, removed the icons from the desktop, and shut down the taskbar. Watched as my coworkers were as confused as babies in a topless bar. http://forums.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/wink.gif

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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

[The-Fro]

My favorite can only be done in a computer lab where computers are placed back-to-back on a table and the users face each other over their monitors. When two people across from each other aren't looking, switch their keyboard plugs. When they type, nothing happens, but then phantom typing shows up, as they other person realizes that "their computer is broken too." Usually takes the teacher a bit to figure out what's going on, and is always worth a few laughs.

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A mind really is like a parachute: It's a million-to-one you'll need one in this lifetime.