Delbruc
December 26th, 2002, 04:05 PM
Just thought I'd share this with you... An original creation by me...
1337 Kristmas By Delbruc (with apologies to Major Henry Livingston Jr.)
T’was the night before Christmas and all through the house
Not a gamer was stirring, not even an optical mouse
The PC’s were humming in the corner, sucking air
In the hopes that 1337 |\|1C|<, would soon ‘port there
The young frAggers had all crashed on top of their beds,
While visions of Complete Domination played in their heads
And mamma tagged “Mischief” and I bustin’ a cap
Had just settled in for a pause while DoD changed the map.
When from the server tower there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my seat, fearing loss of a platter
Away to the server, we flew like a flash
Tore open the case, “Oh, CRAP, its crashed!!”
The flicker of the neon mounted to the side,
Gave a greenish hue to all parts inside.
When, pulling into my driveway, what should appear
But a service van, with eight tiny tech’s, Oh Dear!
With a little old driver, carrying a HUGE boomstick!
We knew right away, it HAD to be 1337 |\|1C|<
Hopped outta the van toward the game server they came,
1337 |\|1c|< called them all by name
“Go, SLASHER, re-boot GASHER, re-install LANCER and HotViXXXen!
Update GROMMET, log-in SHUPID, play SPANNER and BLITZKRIEGEN
To the top of the rank ladder, top of them all
Kill Nazi’s faster and faster, Kill ‘em ALL!”
Man, you shoulda seen those little guys Fly!
Over and over, they made the Nazi soldiers die!
So back to our PC’s mamma and I flew,
To lend backup to 1337 |\|1c|< ‘s crew!
Then with a keyboard clicking, I heard a small “poof”
Looked at the scoreboard, then I had proof
That 1337 |\|1c|< had joined the game, with that little sound
Now the Nazi rat-bastards would be stomped to the ground!
His player model dressed in camo, from head to toe,
You KNEW this fatty was ready to GO!
With a bundle of grenades slung on his rucksack
He looked like a Demo expert, just waiting for the attack
His eyes – How they twinkled, his ghillie suit all hairy
His trigger finger itchy, his scowl not Merry.
His clean M-1 Carbine drawn close, just so
No Nazis able to hide from his bad-*** glow
A stump of a cigar, held tight in his teeth,
Smoke circled his head, like a deadly wreath.
He was ready to rock, to pump rounds in the Nazi belly
He shot, and said AW-NAW, just like Nelly
He was lean ‘n mean in-game, a righteous player himself
I was excited to play on his team, in spite of myself
With a flick of his wrist and a nod of his head
Soon gave me to know, opponents filled with dread
He team-chatted not a word, but went right to killing
And took all the cap points, with all of us supporting
All the while, thumbing his nose,
To the top of the team rank ladder we rose
At that, he ran to the van, and gave his team the sign
And away they all zoomed, nearly clipping that pine
But I heard 1337 |\|1c|< exclaim, just in time
Happy Christmas to all, and a FRAGGIN’ Good time!
1337 Kristmas By Delbruc (with apologies to Major Henry Livingston Jr.)
T’was the night before Christmas and all through the house
Not a gamer was stirring, not even an optical mouse
The PC’s were humming in the corner, sucking air
In the hopes that 1337 |\|1C|<, would soon ‘port there
The young frAggers had all crashed on top of their beds,
While visions of Complete Domination played in their heads
And mamma tagged “Mischief” and I bustin’ a cap
Had just settled in for a pause while DoD changed the map.
When from the server tower there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my seat, fearing loss of a platter
Away to the server, we flew like a flash
Tore open the case, “Oh, CRAP, its crashed!!”
The flicker of the neon mounted to the side,
Gave a greenish hue to all parts inside.
When, pulling into my driveway, what should appear
But a service van, with eight tiny tech’s, Oh Dear!
With a little old driver, carrying a HUGE boomstick!
We knew right away, it HAD to be 1337 |\|1C|<
Hopped outta the van toward the game server they came,
1337 |\|1c|< called them all by name
“Go, SLASHER, re-boot GASHER, re-install LANCER and HotViXXXen!
Update GROMMET, log-in SHUPID, play SPANNER and BLITZKRIEGEN
To the top of the rank ladder, top of them all
Kill Nazi’s faster and faster, Kill ‘em ALL!”
Man, you shoulda seen those little guys Fly!
Over and over, they made the Nazi soldiers die!
So back to our PC’s mamma and I flew,
To lend backup to 1337 |\|1c|< ‘s crew!
Then with a keyboard clicking, I heard a small “poof”
Looked at the scoreboard, then I had proof
That 1337 |\|1c|< had joined the game, with that little sound
Now the Nazi rat-bastards would be stomped to the ground!
His player model dressed in camo, from head to toe,
You KNEW this fatty was ready to GO!
With a bundle of grenades slung on his rucksack
He looked like a Demo expert, just waiting for the attack
His eyes – How they twinkled, his ghillie suit all hairy
His trigger finger itchy, his scowl not Merry.
His clean M-1 Carbine drawn close, just so
No Nazis able to hide from his bad-*** glow
A stump of a cigar, held tight in his teeth,
Smoke circled his head, like a deadly wreath.
He was ready to rock, to pump rounds in the Nazi belly
He shot, and said AW-NAW, just like Nelly
He was lean ‘n mean in-game, a righteous player himself
I was excited to play on his team, in spite of myself
With a flick of his wrist and a nod of his head
Soon gave me to know, opponents filled with dread
He team-chatted not a word, but went right to killing
And took all the cap points, with all of us supporting
All the while, thumbing his nose,
To the top of the team rank ladder we rose
At that, he ran to the van, and gave his team the sign
And away they all zoomed, nearly clipping that pine
But I heard 1337 |\|1c|< exclaim, just in time
Happy Christmas to all, and a FRAGGIN’ Good time!