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xp home unfortuantely does not make it as easy to network as pro.To access security settings you have to restart in safe mode on home.
Start in safe mode on the home machine and create the share with permissions adding the user from the other machine (i usually find it easier to have a user created on both machines for the other machine with a unique user name and password [which the password can be the same as the other user])restart in normal mode. Then browse to the other machine using search for computer and input IP address for search criteria. When it finds it double click on and when requested for the user name and password input the one you created. This normally allows network sharing.
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You should be able to log in to the router GUI from the wireless, try it....
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Okay well I finally managed to get this problem fixed, but did three things so not sure which one did the job. First of all I changed the workgroup names on both Pc's to MSHOME. (I know the name doesnt matter but I just made sure they were both the same.)
I also ran a winsock fix on the laptop as that was the one that seemed to have all the problems as whenever I tried to access the workgroup it would lock up and I would get no response.
Finally I turned off simple file sharing on the desktop, although I was reluctant to do this as the laptop has XP Home. I rebooted both at the same time and the network worked once again. So who knows what fixed it, but my guess is the winsock fix (although I always had internet access on the laptop.) or turning off simple file sharing, but isnt that what xp home has to use anyway??