[RESOLVED] My favorite problems

[mjdukehart2]

I love it when a user calls up complining that we changed their passwords on them and now they can't get onto their computer. Then you ask them if their CAPS light is on and then they say "Oh, sorry."

[mzcpu]

Here's one:

Customer brought computer in for new modem. We installed tested and all was fine. Customer takes computer home and hooks it up, wife calls me 20 minutes later to say the pc was in safe mode and no amount of rebooting would fix it and then hangs up on me rudely. Well we send a tech over there and find the mouse/keyboard reversed and win98 didn't like that at all. She go a bill for 55.00 for the trip.

[Danrak]

We've had serveral people call up saying they can't get a dial tone after we changed a modem. Well they either forgot to plug it in or plugged it into the wrong hole.

[Damned Angel]

I like it when they bitch about not being able to play music, so u ask them to look at the back of the computer to see where the spk cable is plugged in.

see where you have the speakers plugged in sir...

yes...

now look next to it....

ok...

see the phone line right beside it...

yes....

thats your modem sir, not your soundcard...

oh....

[Paul Cunningham]

We had the mother of all thunderstorms last week

17 New modems later and were still sorting out peoples machines.

Strange thing is, one guy is now on his fourth modem, all zapped by lightning. Why oh why can't he just unplug it !!

[stevet]

How about this one -

Customer calls and says that his computer won't boot. A friend of his gave him some memory and he decided he could install it himself. The new RAM is recognized by the BIOS, says the customer, but Win95 won't start. Not knowing exactly what I'm dealing with, I suggest he bring it in to the shop. When I open the case, with him looking over my shoulder (don't you just love it when they do that?), I begin searching for the cause of the problem. I expect to find a problem with the memory installation, so I start there. He has a mini-tower case and things are pretty tight inside. To get to the SIMM slots I have to move the hard drive. As I disconnect the cable and scan the inside of the case for anything unusual, I notice that something looks a bit odd. I follow the cable to make sure its connected to the correct controller on the motherboard. But I find that its not connected to the motherboard at all - it is connected directly to his CD-ROM drive! In trying to install the new RAM (which was installed correctly BTW) he had disconnected both of his IDE cables. When he re-installed the cabling, he connected the hard drive directly to the CD-ROM and the primary IDE controller directly to the secondary IDE controller. I couldn't help but laugh, even though he was right behind me. I semi-contained myself, reconnected the cables, tested the system, and charged him our minimum service charge.

I enjoyed that one...

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Steve Taylor - Service Manager
Altoplanos Information Systems, Inc.
Coeur d'Alene, Idaho USA
www.altoplanos.net

[Renée]

My favorite phrase in the world, and it works almost like a catch-all...

"Well, it was fine before you were here last, but now..."

It's ALWAYS an unrelated problem.

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GeekGirl
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[oldman]

or the one that asks to have one problem fixed but they don't tell you the "neighborhood guru" helped them "upgrade" or they had already spent hours on it!!! and the problem is something in a completely different area

[This message has been edited by oldman (edited January 10, 2000).]

[pcshark]

And who among us has not had this conversation.

Me: "So it worked yesterday."
User:"Yes."
Me: "And today it doesn't work."
User:"Right."
Me: "Did you install anything or make any changes to it?"
User:"No."
Me: "Did anything change on it at all?"
User:"Nothing."
Me: "So out of the blue with nothing changing it stopped working."
User:"Yes."

...Fifteen minutes later...

User:"Well, it actually stopped working right after I installed..."

Go figure (-:

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R. Bret Walker, CNE

[Damned Angel]

I just had that call 10 min ago!!

[WildTech]

I love the calls from the self proclaimed "expert gamers". My favorite involved a guy that installed Unreal Tournament on his system. A system that I built, by the way. He proceeded to tell me how he liked to play with all the settings for high resolution and sound quality enabled and how disappointed he was in the performance he was getting from his computer. He informed me in his "expert gamers" lingo that the game had a tendency to be a bit laggy. He complained for nearly 10 minutes without taking a breath. When he paused, I reminded him that when he had purchased his machine two years prior, that he had opted for a 166mmx processor and 16mgs of ram. Hardly a gamers configuration. When he ask how much it would cost for a system that would perform to his expectations, I shot him a price on a 700 Athlon with 128 mg of PC133. He shot me a dirty look and vacated the premisis. You just can't make some guys happy........hehe..

[TheLow1]

WildTech that is SO TRUE. Those people think paying the least for a slow system is a game. I have seen the Value Gamer in full swing. Nothing like listening to people complain about the price of a new 20 GB hard drive to install there games when they won't come off with a couple of bucks for another 32MB of memory.

[murphy1]

As a pc tech and an avid gamer, i once was a frugal gamer. I understand where some of these people are coming from. That is why i personaly buy and test lower cost items to find the gems, and they are out there. There is always a *better* product, but i really believe that with research and exsperience, you can(I do) desighn and built good machines with great performance and reliability at reasonable costs.
My favorite cost effective and reliable combo right now is.
abit bh6 64mb pc133,Guillemont maxigamer pheonix banshee video, creative ensoniqe pci128 sound, celeron 366 to 466 or pII 350-400 AMD is ok too i have heard(i still like intell) wisecom 56k softmodem, all in a generic atx case. The maxigamer phoenix is a marvelous vidcard. while not the fastest, they are good solid performers, at a good price. these cards were rated #1 by pcgamer, and a couple of other magazines a while ago.

I have ran a diamond monsterfusion banshee...ok, but not spectacular, and a gigabyte ga630...a piss poor attemp at a banshee card, don't use this one.
banshee cards a somewhat hard to find now, but they are still out there.
notice that none of these components are cutting edge, but all still work beutifully for the average gamer. I like 3dfx, because it will run *any* game or software, although some may require a patch. you get very few....HEY!! my game won't run whats wrong with my system???......calls.

[JT]

Here's one for you....

Had a user call up one day with an urgent (?!?!?) problem. My modem isn't working.

Me: ok, are there any messages on screen about other applications using the port, or that the phone line is in use
User: No
Me: Can you check everythings plugged in and you've 3 lights on the modem
User: Ok
Me: Are they all plugged in?
User: Yes
Me: Ok can you double-click on the DUN connection and we'll see what happens
User: Ok, I'll just switch my computer on....

Nuff Zed!

[TheLow1]

Ring, Ring,

ME:Hello *****Helpdesk, How may I help you?
THEM:My password expired.
ME: What password?
THEM: I don't know. Network I think.
ME: What server do you log into?
THEM: I Don't know you are supposed to be the computer people.
ME: Click.....