Came a hero of intergalatic proportions, faster than a disk crash, more powerful than a team of lawyers. He hides in the shadows, fighting piracy from behind his desk. With his trusty sidekick "Clippy" and his special powers, namely being able to turn ordinary objects into $100 bills. He has sworn to fight the evil Tux and his Open Source Army, fear in his presence and make way for...

Microsoft Man!

OK, OK so I made it all up, but if you were a Superhero what would be your name, who would you fight and what special powers would you possess???