Things to ponder......

[Sowulo]

1. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does
he become disoriented?

2. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland
called Holes?

3. Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?

4. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

5. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

6. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

7. When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts" and you put your two
cents in ... what happens to the other penny?

8. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

9. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread
to begin with?

10. When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?

11. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who
drives a race car not called a racist?

12. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?

13. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?

14. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?

15. "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language.
Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?

16. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow
that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged,
models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

17. If FedEx and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

18. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

19. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

20. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more
as they get older; then it dawned on me. They're cramming for their final
exam.

21. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons
and forks so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

22. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are
we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on
the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the
mail?

23. If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the
others here for?

24. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

25. No one ever says, "It's only a game" when their team is winning.

26. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

27. Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went
nuts.

28. If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

29. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

30. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece on those little
bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE

31. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing
section in a swimming pool?

32. If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" and the Tampa Bay
Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs," what does that make the Tennessee
Titans?

33. If four out of five people SUFFER from diarrhea, does that mean that
one enjoys it?

34. There are three religious truths: -- Jews do not recognize Jesus as the
Messiah.
-- Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian
faith.
-- Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters.

[Morticia Addams]

Always thought of those myself

Heres one to add

Why do they put Braile on ATM machines.

[Spork]

If a beer falls and no one is there to catch it, is it considered Alcohol Abuse?

[crazyman]

I am a polish white boy and my wife is a latina from mexico,does that make our kids "policans"?

LOL......

[crazyman]

why do they call them "jumbo shrimp" ?

[opiate]

[quote]Originally posted by MorticiaAdams:
<strong>Always thought of those myself

Heres one to add

Why do they put Braile on ATM machines.</strong><hr></blockquote>

Why do they put Braile on building floor number signs by the stairs?

[Major Kong]

OK a few more ponderances:

1. What do chickens think we taste like?
2. What do people in China call their good plates?
3. What do you call a male ladybug?
4. When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
5. Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
6. Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
7. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
8. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
9. Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
10. Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
11. Why are there Interstates in Hawaii?
12. Why are there flotation devices in the seats of planes instead of parachutes?
13. Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
14. Have you ever imagined a world without hypothetical situations?
15. How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
16. If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why does it have locks on the door?
17. Why is a bra singular and panties plural?
18. You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
19. If a firefighter fights fire and a crime fighter fights crime, what does a freedom fighter fight?
20. If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, how do they get baby oil?
21. If a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose?
22. If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, what happens?
23. Why is it that when you transport something by car it is called shipment, but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?
24. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
25. What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?
26. Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
27. If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of Progress
28. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

[ephmynus]

Those are all good. Anyone have any of their own?

One thing that I've always pondered that I'll take credit for is:

If you have a glass of ice water, and the ice melts, is it watered down?

(edited) - Um sorry. I'm an idiot

[snooper2]

why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways

[shamus]

[quote]Originally posted by Aplustech:
<strong>Those are all good. Anyone have any of their own?

One thing that I've always pondered that I'll take credit for is:

If you have a glass of ice water, and the water melts, is it watered down?</strong><hr></blockquote>


LOL...when water melts?

Why do I have to Start in order to Shutdown if I'm already there?

[Fubarian]

dunno if this have been said, but...

Why do hotdogs come in packs of ten and buns in packs of eight?

[Sowulo]

[quote]Originally posted by MorticiaAdams:
<strong>Always thought of those myself

Heres one to add

Why do they put Braile on ATM machines.</strong><hr></blockquote>

More importantly, Why do they use Braile on PARKING GARAGE ELEVATORS????

[Geek #1]

If music is the food of love, why don't we eat in record stores??

If you loose something "It's always in the last place you look", why don't you look there first?

Why don't Eskimo's get frostbite?

[Spork]

If a person with multiple personalities kills himself, is it still considered suicide?

[flyboy747]

[quote]Originally posted by pakprotector:
27. If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of Progress
[/QB]<hr></blockquote>

My all time favorite