you probably need a new computer

[geeksRus]

if you periodically have to use a pencil eraser on the bus connector to the hard drive controller...you need a new computer.

[constructor]

Bloody Hell its Packard Bell - you need a new computer

[Archer]

If you keep resurecting old posts you need to sell your computer

[firemonkey]

If you are looking for programs that are OS/2 compatiable, you might need a new computer.


If you are looking to install a new CD drive into a machine that never had one, sience you bought it new.


if your mouse has one button


If your OS is older then yourself

[MacGyver]

If your computer case is as yellow as mustard, you probably need a new computer.

If your keyboard has less than 101 keys...
If your monitor has a 0.39+ dot pitch...
If you have an Ad-Lib sound card...
If you have a 9-pin dot matrix printer...

[Lost]

If you bought it from known terrorist's for 25 buck's because it's a p4
with 1 gig of memory...but there's a strange ticking noise.

[FatalException0E]

If your computer case is as yellow as mustard, you probably need a new computer.

If your keyboard has less than 101 keys...
If your monitor has a 0.39+ dot pitch...
If you have an Ad-Lib sound card...
If you have a 9-pin dot matrix printer...

I'm trying to remember how many pins our remote printers have.....either 7 or 9, I think.

[3fingersalute]

If your computer contains the workd "Packard" anywhere within its name, you probably need a new computer!

[3fingersalute]

I'm trying to remember how many pins our remote printers have.....either 7 or 9, I think.

9

Dot Matrix come in a 9 or 24 pin configuration.

[3fingersalute]

If your computer came with 12 free months of AOL or MSN online, and you actually signed up for it, you probably need a new computer!

[FatalException0E]

9

Dot Matrix come in a 9 or 24 pin configuration.

Well, these are point of sale stuff, so its a bit different....or maybe not. They do indeed have 9 pins, even the brand new ones

[FatalException0E]

If you're trying to get a bigger hard drive, but have to find somebody who still sells 2GB drives, because that's all your BIOS supports...

If maintaining your computer requires a degree in electrical engineering and a good soldering iron...

[corturbra]

If its raining in Guadal-hara - you won't need a new computer but an umbrella would be handy.....

[clascomp]

I have been around for quite a while, but I'm glad to see this thread enjoyed a long life. I think I'll resurect it with one I got today, just for old times sake.

Guy comes in today and asks "Do you have an svideo cable to make my printer work on my computer?" (old mac printer--used pc from yard sale)

You probably need.........

[3fingersalute]

I went on a call last night, the guy said he needed some upgrades. Turns out, he was still running Windows 95, and IE4, and was having problems accessing a lot of sites - go figure.

I explained to him that his machine was way beyond upgrading anymore, and helped him sit down and order a new little Dell system.