The White House - 2005

[notorious_carl]

This is a joke and thought some of you would like to see it.


The White House - 2005

One sunny day in 2005, an old man approached the White House from across Pennsylvania Avenue, where he'd been sitting on a park bench.

He spoke to the Marine standing guard and said, "I would like to go in and meet with President Kerry."

The Marine replied, "Sir, Mr. Kerry is not President and doesn't reside here."

The old man said, "Okay," and walked away.

The following day, the same man approached the White House and said to the same Marine, "I would like to go in and meet with President Kerry."

The Marine again told the man, "Sir, as I said yesterday, Mr. Kerry is not President and doesn't reside here."

The man thanked him and again walked away.

The third day, the same man approached the White House and spoke to the very same Marine, saying "I would like to go in and meet with President Kerry."

The Marine, understandably agitated at this point, looked at the man and said, "Sir, this is the third day in a row you have been here asking to speak to Mr. Kerry. I've told you already that Mr. Kerry is not the President and doesn't reside here. Don't you understand?"

The old man answered, "Oh, I understand. I just love hearing it."

The Marine snapped to attention, saluted, and said, "See you tomorrow."

[techs]

2005.
War vet with one leg comes up to White House and asks to see the President.
President Kerry says come on in.

[Ya_know]

The old man answered, "Oh, I understand. I just love hearing it."

The Marine snapped to attention, saluted, and said, "See you tomorrow."

HooRah!

[Wayward Clam]

More realistic version:

2005. War vet walks up to the White House. Is unable to approach within 1/2 mile to ask whether any president is in due to anti-terrorism measures.

[techs]

Other possiblities:

Asks where is the White House since it has been moved to an "undisclosed location".

All the Marines are fighting in foreign wars. Rent a cop asks "Jou meen jou wan to spek with Bicsh?"

Marine blows away old man. Acting under new "Rules of Engagement" regarding enemy combatants.

Marine looks up old mans voting record as per new Patriots Act.

Marine tells old man that seniors are no longer welcome. Says, "Didn't you get the message when we ended Social Security?"

[Diver01]

Even more possibilities:

The Earth spins off its axis and slams into the Sun.
The moon spins off its axis and slams into Earth
A Giant Alien Spaceship in command by GWB shows up in orbit and destroys the planet Earth

[Cleetus]

HooRah!

Wouldn't that be against your little marine corps codes?

[WebHead]

The MOST realistic scenario:

War vet walks towards the white house but can't make it up the stairs because of all the homeless people sleeping there. He then sees the sign on the door reading, "I'm on vacation, be back in a few weeks - GWB". He then leaves a note for the president on the gate that reads, "My job got shipped to India and I haven't found a new job in 2 years and I'm hungry. Will you help me?". The marine guard outside sees the note and hands the war vet a letter from GWB that forces the war vet to reenlist in the Marines to go fight in Iraq even though the war vet has been retired for 10 years. So the war vet goes to Iraq and gets killed during a car bombing that occured in downtown between some Iraqi extremists. Meanwhile, GWB is vacationing. While on vacation, he falls off his bike and it makes headlines. A week later he goes to Florida to campaign for the 24th time this year.

[paraflyer]

Even more possibilities:

The Earth spins off its axis and slams into the Sun.
The moon spins off its axis and slams into Earth
A Giant Alien Spaceship in command by GWB shows up in orbit and destroys the planet Earth

No, no, no...

Just take the idea behind Space:1999 and push the dateline into the early 21st century.

"With the threat of bombing the Yucca Mountain facilty by Greenpeace and Earth First 'insurgents', the US government has decided to transport all nuclear waste to the newly established Moonbase Alpha storage facility."

....and when the moon is blown out of orbit, then Al Gore will finally have the "greenhouse effect" that he's so fond of, due to no nearby gravity well to strip off atmosphere caused by outgassing across the planet.

[Ya_know]

Wouldn't that be against your little marine corps codes?

Well the salute may have been over the top, but it was still a funny joke...it's a joke...don't forget that...

[Archer]

So is the thought of President Kerry [bum,bum]

Perhaps he should rename himself John KY to make it easier to slip in

[techs]

No, no, no...

Just take the idea behind Space:1999 and push the dateline into the early 21st century.

"With the threat of bombing the Yucca Mountain facilty by Greenpeace and Earth First 'insurgents', the US government has decided to transport all nuclear waste to the newly established Moonbase Alpha storage facility."

....and when the moon is blown out of orbit, then Al Gore will finally have the "greenhouse effect" that he's so fond of, due to no nearby gravity well to strip off atmosphere caused by outgassing across the planet.

Any explosion big enough to move the moon out of it's orbit would completely destroy the moon. Space 1999 was built on a false assumption. Just like Bushes invasion of Iraq to stop terrorism.