Best Comeback Line Ever

**hudsonsmith** · November 16th, 2004, 04:27 PM

This was in the Washington Post... the title of the article was "Best Comeback Line Ever." In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38p.m. on Friday. Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on Monday.

The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview. Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his need. "I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to notice a Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until Officer Brenda Taylor approached him. "It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said Officer Taylor. "I walked up (to Lawrence) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."

Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence. "I just went up and said, 'Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?' "He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then looked me straight in the face and said, "A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?"

**meatwad** · November 16th, 2004, 04:32 PM

**notorious_carl** · November 16th, 2004, 05:00 PM

that's an oldie. i remeber hear that sometime last year also. but it is still funny

**jitBob** · November 16th, 2004, 05:08 PM

**confus-ed** · November 16th, 2004, 06:38 PM

Originally Posted by hudsonsmith

"A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?"

So I must be suffering from 'uptight Britishness'

, but in the Cinderella story the pumkin gets changed into a coach for the mice which get changed into horses to pull, to take cinderella to the Ball

- so its a terrible comeback line - ha !

**GrandDad** · November 16th, 2004, 08:52 PM

Originally Posted by confus-ed

So I must be suffering from 'uptight Britishness'

, but in the Cinderella story the pumkin gets changed into a coach for the mice which get changed into horses to pull, to take cinderella to the Ball

- so its a terrible comeback line - ha !

Oh yes it is , in that guys FairyTale the "pumpkin" had been turned into a Princess earlier that day and at midnight she turned back into a 'pump'kin

you have to learn to read between the lines

**confus-ed** · November 17th, 2004, 05:00 AM

Originally Posted by GrandDad

Oh yes it is , in that guys FairyTale the "pumpkin" had been turned into a Princess earlier that day and at midnight she turned back into a 'pump'kin

you have to learn to read between the lines

Err my reading between the lines said he was a twisted & deluded soul who had to come up with a reason for his depravity, so ok for someone dellusional it was indeed a good comeback line - but I'm sure thats an oxymoron .. Now what was that about lines again ?

**jitBob** · November 17th, 2004, 10:58 AM

Originally Posted by confus-ed

Err my reading between the lines said he was a twisted & deluded soul who had to come up with a reason for his depravity, so ok for someone dellusional it was indeed a good comeback line - but I'm sure thats an oxymoron .. Now what was that about lines again ?

For clearer meanings, please lay off of the lines!

**Tekboy** · November 17th, 2004, 11:47 AM

Originally Posted by confus-ed

Err my reading between the lines said he was a twisted & deluded soul who had to come up with a reason for his depravity, so ok for someone dellusional it was indeed a good comeback line - but I'm sure thats an oxymoron .. Now what was that about lines again ?

Sounds like a line of folderol to me