I am published!

**Guts3d** · January 25th, 2008, 09:40 AM

My review of a really bad Steven Segal movie.

Be gentle!

**Guts3d** · June 2nd, 2008, 02:13 PM

My newest review of a really bad movie. Published twice!

**Archangel42069** · June 2nd, 2008, 03:01 PM

Congrats! Always exciting to be published!

When you said "Be gentle" I assumed you wanted comments, so here goes...

First I'd like to say that pretty much all of this applies to your colleagues on Monstershack as well, so perhaps these are simply characteristics of the society rather than "problems" to be "fixed".

Your reviews seem a bit wordy...I'd love to see it pared down to a 2 paragraph synopsis and then your afterthoughts.

A review should, in my opinion, serve one of two purposes:

1. Inform the uninformed. This group of people hasn't seen the movie - don't tell em what's coming at every scene change. They need something that says "This movie is generally focused on ______(movie type), and the director ________(failed/succeeded) because______(general description of failure/success). If you like _______(movie type) movies, you'll ______(love/hate) this movie.

2. Inspire the uninspired. This group of people HAS seen the movie (at least up to the point they walked out), and some may have chosen to forget about the movie(they'll only need quick refreshers), or may be obsessed with the movie(these will correct your mistakes in the description of the movie - less details means fewer mistakes). We want these people to talk with us and/or each other about the movie, discuss the pros/cons, and express their individual opinions on the movie. Some people just need a starting point to begin their discussion, and your review is it.

Sorry for the lengthy reply...just some thoughts from a fellow (aspiring) writer.

**NooNoo** · June 3rd, 2008, 03:30 AM

Hey Guts, great start. I have to agree that there are wayyyyy to many spoilers... I love the line that L Ron forgot science fiction starts with science!

I have read a couple of his books, and I don't know if I got the wrong impression, but they did seem to me to be "tongue in cheek" especially with the alien "dialogue". How close to the book is the movie?

**Guts3d** · June 3rd, 2008, 10:58 AM

Dunno, I haven't had the courage to buy it. If I see it used, I'll pick it up and say it is for a friend. As I recall, the movie was only the first half of the 4 inch thick book. Yikes!
Thanks for the suggestions, Archangel42069, I'll try to keep it less wordy in the future. But these are walk throughs and they, by neccessity, are long. The Steven Segal review was a bit funnier, IMHO.

**slgrieb** · June 3rd, 2008, 12:59 PM

Congratulations, Guts! The downside of being published, though, is that somewhere, somehow, your words are likely to be preserved to the end of time. About 30 years ago I wrote an article that contained a truly stunning and stupid goof in the math comparing efficiencies in related equipment. The editor failed to catch the error as well. The comparisons were valid, but the absolute numbers were wrong. I was humiliated at the time, but the magazine printed the corrections and I got over it. Until 11years ago when I had it all thrown back in my face by a pimply teenager who had read this thing because his dad collected the magazine.