Actual Ticket Titles, please contribute

**PacMan** · May 2nd, 2008, 11:59 AM

I work as desktop Support for a company and we usually get some tickets that I would like to share with others. So yeah, so my fellow desktop support, we read some of these and I just decided I would share with Windrivers. Please feel free to add your as well. Oh, and our helpdesk cant spell, so if you have those typos too, please contribute and make our work day at least a bit more comical.

These are a few in our queue right now:

“User is having problems with Microsoft Windows application software.”
“system intermittently freezin gup”
“User's Laptop runs extremely slow.”
“new system last week”
“mouse is acting strange”
“Dirty Copies on printers”

**Niclo Iste** · May 2nd, 2008, 01:32 PM

Not really a ticket but it was a freudian slip of sorts. Back in 98 I had a client asking me if a product was worth getting and I told them that the Norton Crash Generator was a decent product. I was supposed to tell them about the box of Norton Crash Guard they had brought up to me. That made a wonderful explanatory discussion.

**Guts3d** · May 2nd, 2008, 01:49 PM

My fave is Microsoft Internet Exploder.

**NooNoo** · May 2nd, 2008, 02:08 PM

I still get emails saying that the email doesn't work...

**Guts3d** · May 2nd, 2008, 03:46 PM

Another one: "User cannot turn the computer on."

To which I reply: "Did you try rubbing it gently and whispering sweet nothings?"

**xpuser357** · May 2nd, 2008, 06:51 PM

Originally Posted by Guts3d

Another one: "User cannot turn the computer on."

To which I reply: "Did you try rubbing it gently and whispering sweet nothings?"

This one gave me a smile

**Guts3d** · May 3rd, 2008, 10:43 AM

Another: " Customer kicked computer, now it won't boot".

Supposedly, he kicked it accidentally.

**PuterGeekGirl** · May 7th, 2008, 08:14 AM

I once got one saying a gal had 'lost her hoverability' (when she put her mouse over something the info didn't display like normal) I stopped by and told her that's something women do over public toilets as far as I'm concerned, she'd better see a dr.

**PacMan** · May 7th, 2008, 02:07 PM

Here are some latest:

Laptop T61 - Running VERY slow; locking up (capitalizing very

)

This guy keeps putting in tickets to try to get an upgrade:
User has a T43 laptop and is requesting a new battery. Battery lasts only around an hour.
He sent in a user request form for an update, reason = yeah I need an X-61 cause the T-43 is too heavy on my shoulder strap..

I hate those tickets with system running slow and helpdesk doesn’t do any troubleshooting, no info for us. And its the same few users too.. They keep requesting upgrades and then a month later.. “system slow.” PICNIC users.. (problem in chair not in computer).. And this company has all users as admins so you wonder why I get so many tickets..

**Niclo Iste** · May 8th, 2008, 06:17 PM

It just dawned on me if you want to see some fantastic tickets of an absurd nature check out "The Chronicles of George". George is known for havening lots of fun tickets. (yes I know I typed having wrong)

http://chroniclesofgeorge.nanc.com/tickets1.htm