What do you do with these types of clients?

[Niclo Iste]

I was just thinking about this and I'm wondering how does everyone cope with a few types of clients.

A: The Faux Emergency - They call asking for you to come out and they want you NOW you have to be there NOW. You can't have clients before them because your whole purpose of being a tech was waiting for this exact moment where this individual has called so you can fulfill your role in the world. Oh wait it costs extra to be listed as emergency visit? OK when's your next opening? I can wait.

B: The Spending the Change out of the Couch - Yes I need service on my computer. Can you give me a quote over the phone? Well I need an exact quote you see I only have your minimal rate or half of that and what I describe is so vague you can't get an idea of what I'm saying is wrong. By the way I have none of my original software insert excuse why here.

C: The IT Specialist - Hi I need someone to come out and work on my computer. Here is the prognosis and how I think you can fix it. Upon arrival they critique you, tell you what they think it is, what they think caused it, what they believe is the fix. To add to it when you prove them wrong they go on to say google says you shouldn't do that, or their friend says you shouldn't do that either. To add to the fun they also ask if you really are a tech and why they sent a rookie if it's not fixed in the first 15 minutes.

[Guts3d]

Heh Heh... I have had so many of those bozos.. but you forgot the worst one of all...

D. " It was working yesterday... Why isn't it working now? What did you do to it??? Oh, that's not my pron, someone else downloaded that 3 gigs.

[Matridom]

A: Yes there is a surcharge for short notice and/or Emergency appointments - Charge twice the amount.

B: Sorry i`m not able to do quotes over the phone, We have a minimum X charge for looking at a system and giving a quote on the repair.

C:Walk away when they start telling you that you are wrong. If they ask why, "Well, you are obviously more experienced than I am, I`m sure there is nothing more I can help with. I have the utmost confidence in Google/Friend/Other Expert of solving the problem."

[BOB IROC]

I have run into these types at my Job and when I do side jobs so I can relate. There is no rest and in some cases no respect for the "computer guy/girl"

Here is how I handle them:

A. At my job everything to my users is an emergency and they seem to think they are the most important. We have a work order tracking system and a help desk but some people feel they should be put ahead of the line. I handle the work orders as they come in but there are many times that the users will complain to my boss or to someone higher and I frequently get told to take care of them first. That drives me nuts because all it does is enable these people to complain more.
Outside of work I will get sidejobs usually by referrall of a family member or friend and to these people I say I can work on the computer and I rarely do onsite visits unless it is a job that must be done onsite like network install or something. If they do not like my schedule they can go elseware and most of the time they come back to me once the get a price from places like Geeksquad because I am usually way cheaper.

B. If I get a call and the person is willing to describe the problem I can sometimes give them a couple "in the ballpark" estimates over the phone based on the problem description. I always tell them there is a minimum diagnostic charge no matter what and I will call them with the diagnosis and an estimate before I perform the work. Most of my side work is small repairs and/or problems caused by viruses/malware. If there is hardware involved I price out the part from a store where I will purchase it from and I usually round that up to the nearest $5 increment after tax to make the bill even and easy to add up. I give them the option to buy the part(s) themselves or I purchase it and tack it onto the bill.

C. I get a lot of this in my workplace. I have many staff and teachers that are "know it alls" and think they can diagnose the problem themselves. 90% of the time they are way off. I am just happy if they give me an accurate description of the problem. Most times I just get general information like "the computer gave me an error" without getting what the error said or what they were doing when the error happened. So using my awesome powers of ESP I have to cycle through the billions of errors that could possibly happen. Fortunately usually telling them to reboot the computer works most of the time even though they hate to hear me say that. I hate when they try to correct me or add in little tidbits about their friend that also thinks he/she is a computer genius. I have been in IT professionally for 20 years and when I know I am right about something I hate being told that I am not.

In reference to Guts' situation I get that too. If something works one day and not the next they always ask why and you can reference back to my awesome ESP abilities for that one. But when they try to blame me or the technology department then I get a bit defensive and usually find a way to point it back on them. I have gotten this a few times on my sidejobs where a client will call back months or sometimes over a year later and try to say that I did something to cause it to fail. I find it funny because they are also asking me to fix the problem too. If they think I sabotaged the computer why would they come back to me. If they are real jerks about it I tell them to go to h3ll and say I have a job and the little money I would make off them is not worth dealing with them as a person.

But for the most part I have very satisfied clients and will get calls from people for sidework because the person I helped in the past was very happy with my work. When it comes to computers the general users are very clueless and will almost never put the blame on themselves even though statistically most computer problems can be traced back to the user(s).

[Niclo Iste]

I just realized I never put my answers though I think it helped it be more favorable to replies from everyone.

A: I just tell them I can't come out, they can wait or pay an emergency service fee. If they feel that they shouldn't pay the fee I suggest they figure out who's in front of them in line and tell that person why they think they're more important than the other that already was waiting.

B: I just tell them I don't quote over the phone. I suggest I can diagnose from the description 4 different causes, I then go on with a list of steps and proceedures with estimated times based on a computer with a dual core 1.4 that has 2 gigs RAM. I then inform them if their specs are lower than that then the time can draw on longer, not to mention if there are background programs running those can compound the delay into a longer increment. Basically I guess you can say since they want to waste my time on the phone I waste theirs to the point of them making the decision of just pay to have me show up or go to geek squad and have the drive wiped out by high schoolers on minimum wage.

C: If they cut it out after the first 5 minutes I ignore them. If they keep it up and intentionally do it to light a fire under my ***, or to convince me to not charge as much I stop what I'm doing. I then look them in the eye while I'm visibly agitated and indicate I don't need to be there, I've a long list of clients who want me to be elsewhere that actually give me things or tips becasue they're happy I showed up. I then inform them I can stop now bill for the time I wasted and leave. I also indicate my time frame of experience, my background in the job that I'm doing and what referrals I have. I then indicate that all of that information I just provided gives me the justification to walk out and not care about their PR0N box and that I will not be bothered in the slightest that I don't do business with them ever again. This has a happy result for me all around. They either say fine and pay and I leave, or they shut up and let me do my job. 9 times out of 10 they shut up and leave me to do my job.

Interestingly I haven't had anyone call me up to claim I sabotaged them. It may be how I handle clients that doesn't lead them to this conclusion. Generally I'm very very nice and welcoming. I only act as an agitated jerk if they make me that way.

[NooNoo]

hmmmm where's that poster...

Something like

Repair Computer $60
Repair Computer while you watch $120
Repair Computer with your help $180

[BOB IROC]

...Interestingly I haven't had anyone call me up to claim I sabotaged them. It may be how I handle clients that doesn't lead them to this conclusion. Generally I'm very very nice and welcoming. I only act as an agitated jerk if they make me that way.

I have had that happen a couple times that I can remember. The one that sticks in my mind the most was a guy that my Mother referred to me which was a customer of hers and I got his computer and it was in very bad shape. He had let his trial antivirus that came with the computer expire and let it go almost 2 years without AV protection and no windows updates applied. His computer was filled with Porn and he had literally 1000's of infections which led me to just restore his computer. I installed a Free antivirus like Avast or AVG or something and made sure it was all up to date. About a year later I got a call from him and he said his computer was messed up again and he said that it was my fault and I had to do something to it because it was almost exactly a year from when I fixed it last. He demanded that I fix it again for free or he was going to sue me. I pretty much told him that I am not responsible for his computer and I did not do anything to make it act up and said he could take it somewhere else to get it fixed as I did not want a person like him as a customer. Well he did take it somewhere else and they charged him like $200 to fix it and he brought the bill in and showed my mom and right on the bill he noted that he wanted the computer checked for evidence of sabotage and underneath the tech comments it clearly stated that no evidence of sabotage was found and stated that problems are caused by his irresponsible browsing habits. Basically downloading infected files and going to malicious websites all to try and get his porn fix.

When it comes to my Job I hear accusations like "what did you do to cause that" all the time. I guess the point of my "sabotage" comment was to illustrate how users rarely take accountability for their computers. Sometimes I find it very frustrating that the finger is always pointed at the computer or the software when it can be proved that the issue could have been avoided if the user knew how to take care of the computer. If the hardware fails it is the OEMs fault and not the fact that they eat and smoke around their computer and they let it get gunk'd up with dust or they use a cheapo surge protector and after years of power fluctuations parts fry out. Or they blame Windows about being unstable but do not want to take the effort to install really good free applications that can keep the malware off.

[slgrieb]

I think how you handle emergencies, faux or otherwise, depends on circumstances. About 2 years ago my largest banking customer had a building struck by lightning, and they were unable to conduct any business until I got there and got some of their network and Internet connections running again. Sure I charged an emergency rate, but this was the kind of situation that had to be a higher priority than the routine work I had scheduled. Part of the emergency rate is time spent making calls to explain delays and reschedule other jobs.

For new customers or existing customers who just think they're more important than anything else on the plate, I explain that emergency rates apply, and that I can only respond if any conflicting appointments can be rescheduled. If I explain to a current customer that I have had an emergency call, but they still want me to honor their appointment, I do it and decline the emergency call. Explanations all round.

I still continue to do free diagnostics on any system brought into the office, subject to my availability. If I can give the customer a reasonable estimate on the work required, I usually get the job, and I'm not out any time that I wouldn't have spent in diagnosis anyway. For cheapskates who want to use the diagnosis to buy a part on ebay and have a cousin do the work, they get a free ride once. Next time around, I'm not so compliant.

[Auric]

I support a fairly large user base, and if an "emergency" pops up, well its usually evaluated based on business impact. Entire office out of the water for a day? Yeah thats an emergency. user unable to check email for a couple hours while I deal with something no way.

I don't do a lot of side work, and when I do I tell them flat out my availability may be limited due to my FT job, and they will have to wait until after 5pm or weekends. My client base is mostly small businesses, people that run their own business etc. I steer clear of the private stuff unless it's a friend.

B. I do not quote over phone/email. I will provide a ballpark figure though. If materials are required for the job, I will give customer option of purchasing or I will take care of it.

C. When I first started in this company, a lot of the management would tell me how they wanted problems fixed, or what the best solution was. (or so they thought)

If it's a side customer and somebody tries to "tell me what to do" I'd just refer them elsewhere, my time is far more valuable to me than the few bucks I'd get for the aggrivation.

D. "well it worked yesterday" that is a common one here, and generally the answer is "i'm not sure what changed from yesterday to today, but it's not working now"

I always get a kick out of companies that have state of the art client PC's, but horrid backends. Recent customer had Win2k Server and 4 Dlink switches running a 50 user network

[Tekboy]

I always charge extra when a customer starts arguing about Google says this, my friend says that, or the ones who just want to see how their knowledge stacks up against that of a real technician. Waste my time, you waste your money. I am as nice as people will let me be. After that they find out that I was not always a mild mannered computer tech,

Unless you are a business, I do not believe in emergencies. Your pr0n can wait as far as I am concerned.

5) How about the ones who say:"My daughter would never go to one of those websites!" ? I get those now and then as well.

[Niclo Iste]

To answer your number 5 tekboy. I never argue past the point that it came from a site. I believe in a users privacy and I never pry or accuse beyond the surface implications. I feel that it's everyone's private business with what they do on their own PC. As far as businesses are concerned. It's a work computer. You have porn on your work PC? Expect your boss to know when I'm done. Confidentiality with clients is my biggest strength. I don't like compromising it.

[NooNoo]

Today's job is another limewire infested machine. Weird I thought, it's the 14 year old son's machine, he will have course work... why doesn't he want me to back up his data first? Well I do anyway, it's part of the service. Open the desktop and there links to every porn site going.... and let's not talk about the wallpaper! OK, on this occasion, shut it down and hit f11 ... gotta love 14 year old boys...

[Auric]

A few years back when I was working part time as a bench tech while in school I remember getting a machine in, not long after the machine being sold to the customer. Of course because it was a new machine they thought it was our fault...

Machine was a standard Asus/Intel config with XP, anyway it was a christmas gift from the customer to his teenage son.

Turn on the machine and start working my way through the "problem" and it was LOADED with gay porn.