The useless thread

[Potato Salad]

I made this thread so people could just post random things or useless information. It will probably be deleted off the board. But meh its the thought that counts

[eboyjones]

More could be added.

http://www.mentalsoup.com/mentalsoup/basic.htm

[Platypus]

Well the thread is a failure so far... that last link is great!

In the same vein:

"A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of what is believed to be the heaviest chemical element yet known to science.

The new element has been named Governmentium.

Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 11 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of governmentium caused one reaction to take 4 days to complete when it would normally take less than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 4 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, governmentium mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization causes some morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as Critical Morass."

[TechZ]

Governmentium, lol, nice one.

One of the more funnier Computer Joke sites: http://rinkworks.com/stupid/

Tech Support: "Do you know what operating system you're on?"
Customer: "Hmmm...what would be a good answer?"

[Potato Salad]

heres something just out of the blue and just stupid.
Stupid Facts

*

Basketball was invented in the United States in 1891.
*

Mercaptan in asparagus is what causes urine to smell.
*

Lachrymatory-factor synthase in onions is what makes you cry.
*

You cannot lose a contact lens in the back of your head.
*

Pigs don't sweat.
*

Like a cow, an elk has four stomachs.
*

Eric Clapton's given birth name was Patrick Clapp.
*

The metallic element gallium can melt in your hand.
(see Periodic Table of Elements)
*

The average speed of a man's orgasm is 28 MPH.
Now that is a fact everybody should know
*

There are no fish living in the Dead Sea.
*

It is illegal to lick toads in Arizona.
*

The largest kidney stone weighed 14 pounds.
*

Frogs don't drink water.

[Potato Salad]

And for all who DON'T know the rules of comabt this is a crash course.



Rules of Combat

If the enemy is in range, so are you.

Incoming fire has the right of way.

Don't look conspicuous: it draws fire.

The easy way is always mined.

Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.

Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous.

The enemy invariably attacks on one of two occasions:
a. When you're ready for them.
b. When you're not ready for them.

Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.

If you can't remember, the claymore is pointed at you. Claymores are labeled "This side toward enemy" for a reason.

If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush.

Don't draw fire, it irritates the people around you.

The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is *not* our friend.

If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.

When in doubt empty the magazine.

Never share a fox hole with anyone braver than you.

Anything you do can get you shot. Including doing nothing.

Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.

Mines are equal opportunity weapons.

A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.

Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last and don't ever volunteer to do anything.

The quartermaster has only two sizes: too large and too small.

Five second fuses only last three seconds.

It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.

Tracers work both ways.