Just all those things your boss/society/the law won't let you get away with. Me personally:

1. Slapping around customers I think are too stupid for the good of society.

2. Putting huge DUMBASS stickers on the computers of those I deem worthy.

3. Mandatory IQ and literacy test before you can buy a computer.

4. The right to be just as neanderthal as the customer. (sometimes ya think they'd just start behaving if they realized what they looked lik)