The Office of French President Chirac
Jan. 21, 2005.

Aide: Monsieur the American President is on the phone for you.
Chirac: Tell Bush I'm not here.
Aide: No Monsieur, the new President, Kerry.
Chirac: Kerry, never heard of him.
Aide: He's the war hero.
Chirac: Never heard of him.
Aide: He's the one that wants to cooperate.
Chirac: Doesn't ring a bell.
Aide: He wants to rebuild our alliance.
Chirac: Still nothing.
Aide: Remember the girl with the boobies at Cannes? It's her father.
Chirac: Put him on.