The Trials and Tribulations of an English Amateur Astronomer
2003 onwards
Look forward to transit of Venus. Rare event, last one was in 1882, next one visible in England is 2117.
Monday 7th June 2004
Weather forecast for tomorrow is clear and sunny in the north of England.
Bung camera batteries in the charger for the morning.
Clean off ton of spyware and porn diallers for two customers who knock on my door.
Go to bed far too late considering the alarm is set for the unholy hour of 5.30am.
Tuesday 5.30am
Alarm goes off (massed ranks of ghetto blasters on timer switch, tuned to Radio 1, not my cup of tea, especially at 5.30am)
Surface from beer induced slumbers. Decide that 5.30am is not just unholy, but downright EVIL !
Stagger to kitchen, put kettle on, glug orange juice, nosh cereal while waiting for super-strength caffeine potion to brew.
Near lethal dose of caffeine gets the eyelids properly open.
Look out of window.
Observe that weather forecast bears about the same relationship to reality as a politicians's election promises.
Utter vile oaths and expletives directed at the clouds I can see covering most of the sky.
6.10am
Gather up telescope, tripod, eyepieces, Barlow tubes, binoculars, camera, piece of paper for projection viewing and go down 3 flights of stairs.
Think "Oh bugger, I forgot to put the batteries in the camera"
Enjoy bit of cardio-vascular workout running up stairs and returning with batteries.
6.15
Arrive at chosen observation site with excellent view of the eastern sky.
Unfortunately eastern sky is about 9/10 cloud cover.
Set up telescope and aim at vague bright patch in the clouds.
http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jeff.ro...ns/vtrans1.jpg
Setting up
6.20 am
Transit of Venus begins. At least, I assume it does, can't see a flipping thing.
http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jeff.ro...ns/vtrans2.jpg
A lovely British summer morning
7.15am
Cloud thins to the point where I can see a faint image projected onto paper. Feverish grab for camera, flick switches and buttons and fire off a pic ... just as heavy cloud covers the sun again.
Refrain from cursing audibly as elderly lady is walking dog nearby. Friendly dog comes over to say hello, nudges tripod out of alignment with sweep of wagging tail.
Make friends with dog and chat with elderly lady while waiting for a glimpse of the sun.
7.25am
Sun emerges briefly. Elderly lady gets to see Venus silhouetted against the Sun. I miss chance of pic. Elderly lady leaves, impressed but slightly bemused, no doubt thinking there's some weird folk hanging round the town these days.
http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jeff.ro...ns/vtrans4.jpg
http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jeff.ro...ns/vtrans5.jpg
http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jeff.ro...ns/vtrans6.jpg
Hi-tech, this astronomy stuff!
7.30 - 9.00am
Manage to grab several shots. Pick up binoculars and watch rabbits hopping and sheep grazing across the valley, with thousands of kittiwakes in distance, flying round their breeding colony on 400ft high cliff face.
http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jeff.ro...ns/vtrans7.jpg
The sheep and rabbits are there, really!
9.30am
Cloud cover increasing. Decide bugger this for a game of soldiers, more coffee required. Head home. Get stared at by curious passers-by. After all, seeing a bloke with a 60mm refractor and tripod under his arm is an everyday occurrence round these parts. Ponder chances of being arrested for going equipped for Peeping Tommery.
http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jeff.ro...ns/vtrans8.jpg
Damn clouds!
9.40 - 11.15am
Watch streaming video of transit from parts of world favoured with unclouded skies. Ain't teh Interweb wonderful?
Muse on why Isaac Newton bothered inventing the reflector telescope, considering the British climate. I can just see his pals in the Royal Society ... "Give up, Isaac, you'll never be able to use it here".
11.15
Hit the shops to replenish coffee supplies. Sun emerges from clouds as I return home. Grab passing friend off street ... "You gotta see this, man, it's a once in a lifetime thing". Poke telescope out of back window. Friend most impressed by sight of clouds scudding across the sun, with Venus visible occasionally. Shoot several more pics.
12 - 12.30pm
Drag another friend in to see the sights (yes, I do have more than one friend :) )
Manage to get some more pics. Aim to catch the final moments of transit, especially the "black drop" effect. Fail miserably as cloud sweeps over the sun. Minutes after the transit finishes, a bloody great patch of blue sky heaves into view.
http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jeff.ro...ns/vtrans9.jpg
http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jeff.ro...s/vtrans10.jpg
Almost got the end as well :(
It's no wonder Brit astronomers go in for radio and infra-red astronomy. If Galileo had lived in England instead of Italy, nobody would EVER have heard of him, he'd have to have settled for looking at passing ships and naked ladies through bedroom windows !
