Printable View
Ahhhhh.... I now understand why you are not afraid.
http://www.asian-recipes.com/authent...huan-style.gif
Squid Rolls Szechuan Style Recipe
Poor Señor Calamar!
http://seawifs.gsfc.nasa.gov/OCEAN_P...GES/I-2000.gif
Smithsonian Squid Exhibit.
____________________________________________
http://forums.windrivers.com/images/.../2010/07/1.jpg
It is my pure and virtuous heart that
gives me the strength of ten!
Expelling a cloud of indelible ink, the nefarious cephalopod makes its escape from the deadly kitchen of Fu Manchu, scuttling across the greasy tile floor in a flurry of tentacles. Out the back door, a quick squirm down the back alley leads our spineless hero to his waiting hot air balloon, which he quickly inflates with a steady stream of meaningless rhetoric.:p
Bwa, ha, ha! Ha, ha! Ha, ha! :grin: :flames:
Maniacal laughter escapes its beak, as the balloon soars into the night sky, high above the roof tops.
Later that night, in the back alley behind a sleazy Taco del Mar on the wrong side of town, our diabolical denizen of the deep meets with his obsessive compulsive henchman, Captain Ahab.
http://stuarthughes.blogspot.com/capn%20ahab.jpg
Plans are laid for revenge on you-know-who.
http://unmuseum.mus.pa.us/whalesq.jpg
____________________________________________
http://forums.windrivers.com/images/.../2010/07/1.jpg
It is my pure and virtuous heart that
gives me the strength of ten!
http://www.lucyreading.com/images/fl.../squidflat.jpg
Little did Daisy, Captain Ahab or any of the Prehistoric Women suspect that the quick, yet squishy, cephalopod was not just a lovable, if somewhat slimy, invertebrate, but one of the dread denizens of the dark, an aquatic undead creature, a Vampire Squid, from Hell! :flames:
A a a a a r r r r r r g g g g g g h h h h h h . . . . ..
Real squids THINK they have a sense of humor. They often create fictional char- acters (don't ask me why, it just sounds like a squidly thing to do..right? ...
Branded by mere humans as thoughtless water dwellers they grow and gather.
The day is coming for their rise to dominance.
They all get 72 virgin prehistoric women.
Ah yes, the weather here has been rather milder than of late, but not as much sun as yesterday, I hasten to add. But it is rather lovely seeing all the crocuses in bloom in Bournville .. and also I noticed as I walked, daffodils were coming up too, I do look forward to when they bloom also. Another lovely place when the daffodils bloom is or are the grounds of Woodbrooke Quaker Study Centre. It is a beautiful vista looking towards the lake, across a field .. a host .. a wonder ... of golden daffodils. Also there is a very lovely walled garden, where you will find all kinds of herbs, vegetables, flowers and the odd gardener. Well not that odd, but sort of normal ... and getting in a muddle here ... also Woodbrooke has a library of very old books, some leather bound, a veritable feast for learned folks and meditative folks .. and also I need to say ... really trying to ... ah hmm ...
We've had an unusually warm and mild winter, here in Norman. Our Naked Ladies were just starting to come up, but it decided to snow and freeze, so I don't know if they will make it. As usual, the weather in Oklahoma has been psychotic and we are in for a hard freeze tonight. Perhaps, we shall mosey on over to the Duck Pond for a picnic, when it warms up next week, before the Thunderstorms blow in.
Away from the tiring task of trouncing the world into terror , our sly cephalopod takes a break with his squishy family, who believe him to be a mild-mannered techno-civil-servant -- little do they know.... bwa ha ha ha!
As the wife and the little squidlets bask in the sun beside an innocent looking Oklahoma duck pond, snacking on krill and anchovetta, the killer kraken, King Kalamari spies a bevy of prehistoric prima donnas prevaricating past the primulas on the posterior part of the pond's precipitous banks.
Quickly he pulls his wallet from under his mantle and gives the squishy wife ten clams to take the squidlets for herring ice cream.
Then suddenly slapping his slippery tentacles together soundly, our super squid obscures the entire sense of this thread in a cloud of inky black verbose verbiage.
Distracted, Daisy and her dames don't stand a chance. The dames had been intent on dilacerating our squishy hero, but now the wrath of the kraken is unleashed in atrocious alliteration. Like some hydra-headed horror, the squid rises to his full mollusc majesty, tentacles flying, and everywhere slimy suckers pucker the masses of prehistoric cellulite.
But just when it looks it is coming to the end for Daisy and her dames, Moby Dick rises to occasion one more time. "God, I love that whale!" sighs Daisy.
http://www.rockisland.com/~orcasurv/spermbr.jpg
Breaching the surface of the pond, Moby bites our hero hard, the cetacean dentures denting the delectable, delicate calamari flesh.
The desperate squid calls for Ahab.
Daisy laughs long and hard, displaying Ahab's peg leg to our disbelieving denizen of the deep.
Meanwhile in a cheap housekeeping room above the sleazy Taco Del Mar on the wrong side of town, Ahab struggles with the hand cuffs, his sweat forming a pool on the rubber sheets. "Damn that devious Daisy!" he shouts.
It looks like the demise of our dastardly denizen of the deep.
Tune in next week, kids, for the exciting continuation of the adventures of King Kalamar.
____________________________________________
http://forums.windrivers.com/images/.../2010/07/1.jpg
It is my pure and virtuous heart that
gives me the strength of ten!
Yeah, it's next week tomorrow !!!Quote:
Originally Posted by houseisland
Leaping, alliterative lizards, Little Daisy! All of the lurid and lengthy linguistic gymnastics leave me breathless, baffled and bemused. Betwixt me and thee, I await the unfolding of this demented drama with delirious delight. :p
...delirious delight? Even enjoying the fact that ..
...what was I going to say?
Ah I remember now, all this talk of the squids getting 72 prehistoric women, I hear that theologians, historians, teachers, scholars, lazy schoolboys, fishmongers, builders, carpenters, college lecturers have all come to the conclusion after lengthy, ponderous study, that all the women on the Prehistoric Planet happen to be gay except for ONE !
She's the Mother of Daisy and Daisy and Daisy and Daisy and Daisy and Daisy and ..
However, the Giant Squid one day realised ......
Let me guess the one who isn,t gay is a lesbian.Kinda like the Queen Bee or would that be King Bee? Humm,who is counting.
However, the Giant Squid one day realised ......
Meanwhile back on the wrong side of town, Yakitori Chi-Ken, the last surviving kamikaze pilot and a modern day scientific whale harvester extraordinaire, docks his cyber-whaling-dory in front of the sleazy Taco Del Mar.
https://forums.windrivers.com/
Taking down the photon sail and dropping the gravity anchor, he hops over the gunnel and onto the sidewalk.
Too tired for much alliteration, he wanders round the back of the Taco Del Mar and into the alley. His head is full of fond recollections of Ahab, blubber and happy times in the fo'c's'le.
At the open door of the cheap housekeeping room, he starts back seeing Ahab handcuffed to the bed frame, resplendent in a diaphanous Sailor Moon costume.
Quickly he adopts the lotus position, and as his alpha brainwaves collide with the physical reality of the room, there is a quantum shift and the housekeeping room becomes a Zen meditation garden. The cuffs on Ahab's wrists fade. "The dreamlike temporal illusion they always were," says Chi-Ken.
Ahab asks, "What about the Sailor Moon costume?"
His face completely inscrutable except for a brief sparkle in his eyes, Chi-Ken mysteriously says, "You choose your reality. I choose mine."
Ahab suddenly notices his King Kalamar utility watch on a large black stone, which had been a dresser. The Squid alert is flashing.
"Ornery octopi," observes Ahab, "the squid's in trouble!"
Suddenly there is another Zen/Quantum shift, and Chi-Ken and Ahab are in the cyber-whaling-dory. The gravity anchor is hoisted, Ahab mans the turbo-photon oars, there is a flash of light, and the dory appears on the duck pond immediately above Moby.
http://www.biosbcc.net/ocean/marines...whimg/6137.jpg
"Hey Sashimi, drop the squid!" shouts Chi-Ken.
Moby, sensing imminent scientific harvesting, drops the squid and sounds to the bottom of the pond to make his get away.
Chi-Ken Zen-projects the cast of Seven Samurai onto the bank of the pond. Daisy drops Ahab's peg leg in fright and flees, her dames right behind her. The leg is Zen levitated back to Ahab, and our damaged diabolical denizen of the deep is pulled on board the dory.
The squid leaves a tender note for the squishy wife and squidlets, dropping it tenderly on the picnic blanket with a tender tentacle.
Chi-Ken then sets course for the dreaded House Island, last refuge of the criminally insane and other MS certified professionals.
There is a flash of light, and then all is quiet.
____________________________________________
http://forums.windrivers.com/images/.../2010/07/1.jpg
It is my pure and virtuous heart that
gives me the strength of ten!