Maybe they can give her the nicest and most understanding awardQuote:
Originally Posted by slgrieb
of the year,after what we did to her original thread she started.
Anyway,I for one always think she deserves the best, :wave: :wave:
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Maybe they can give her the nicest and most understanding awardQuote:
Originally Posted by slgrieb
of the year,after what we did to her original thread she started.
Anyway,I for one always think she deserves the best, :wave: :wave:
I think awards of any kind are not in order for keeping such waffle going, after all it must be taking up space on the Windrivers website, awards are due on this site to all those people who help others out of techno scrapes.
Anyway ....
So Daisy Lost it all and reverted back to her prehistoric......................
....rag rug making.
Then along came a harrassed looking mother, called Daphne, she was on a newspaper hunt. They'd stopped delivering free newspapers, so she had nothing to put on the floor for when the decorator arrived, she worried that blobs of paint might end up on the carpet, well the slime on the floor and bits of paper from the walls might scatter everywhere, upheaval was on the way ... so she dashed off to ...
... Omar, the Tent Maker, to see if he had any surplus tarps, or large pieces of cloth, with which she could cover the furniture and floor. Sadly, Omar was not in. Rather, Daphne was attended by Omar's cousin Aesclepios, the Clothing Designer, who did not have anything resembling a drop cloth, but did sell her a lovely leopard print leotard and matching leg warmers. They were all the rage with the Australopithecenes.
So, stylishly accoutred, Daphne capriciously decided a new coiffure was called for, to go with her chic new clothes. Leaving the fashionista's fabulous cave, the prehistoric mother traipsed on over to the lair of Szerenko, the Mad Stylist, who was busy sharpening axes and heating up irons when she arrived.
"So, what can the Great Szerenko do for you?" he sneered haughtily, squinting at her hair with obvious distaste.
Daphne replied, 'I really don't know, am not sure now that I want my hair done at all, I've gone into a panic in my leopard print leotard and matching leg warmers, because I don't really want the decorator to see me in a leotard !! And if I have my hair done now and blobs of magnolia drop onto it, whatever will I look like? Perhaps I ought to wait until the 3-4 days is up that the lady decorator (yes I did say lady) has finished, because what with hoping she won't drop paint on the new green slime carpet (I did things all the wrong way round ... should have had the decorating done then bought the new slime carpet, woe is me !) and wondering how many dentinarios it's going to cost, I don't know...
So can I cancel my hair appointment for now?"
So the Great Szerenko ...
... sniffed at Daphne, with all the haughty disdain a Hungarian Hair Stylist can muster, and huffed, "No matter! I am not a miracle worker, after all!" He then spun on the heel of his violet velour boot, snapped his fingers and stormed off, leaving Daphne alone in the foyer of his cave.
She blinked a couple of times, then pressed the fingertips of her right hand to her lips, suppressing an explosive guffaw surging up her throat. "Oh, well!" she thought, "I'll need to find another stylist after my cave is redone." In the interim, she decided to find a more suitable attire than the garish costume she currently wore. That salesman had been extraordinarily good, actually.
So, the harried Daphne hurried to ...
...get everything ready for the decorator, because the decorator had sent a pigeon that morning to say she and a MAN would be arriving the next day, instead of the day after that.
So Daphne went into a panic, because she was planning to move into another cave while hers was being done, however the decorator said you won't have to do that, we'll do one area at a time, so you'll only have to move out for one night.
Then the decorator said, 'we're doing the tiling as well aren't we?' 'No', said Daphne, 'only the upper floors of the cave, not the downstairs bathing area, we emailed about that'.
Then the decorator said, 'Right magnolia gloss' and Daphne sighed, 'No', she said,' we emailed about that too (well pigeons) and I said White Matt paint, you haven't bought it yet have you?'
'No', said the Decorator.
So Daphne dashed around moving a few things and decided the best policy was to t.r.y a.n.d R.E.L.A.X .... until tomorrow.
She was convinced that even if she didn't have to move out of the cave, she would be stepping round ladders, paint pots, dustsheets, etc in the upper reaches of the cave ...
She looked a bit sheepish, cos she does have a hair appointment already booked in a cave called 'Mirror Image', for the same afternoon that the decorator and MAN is arriving in the morning ...
So the next day....
(Hey guys, this is actually happening
in real life, in my home, aarggh!)
Your posts did have that realistic, detailed feel to them. :pQuote:
Originally Posted by Mags
Daphne yawned.. :grin:
... leaned back on her over-stuffed divan and plucked another cold grape from a heavily escutcheoned, silver bowl of ice. Popping the dark, sweet, seedless fruit into her mouth, she waved languidly at the brawny Nubian servant, fanning her with several large ostrich plumes, signalling him to stop. It was getting rather cool.
Daphne sighed. Things were rather quiet and tedious around here, since that roguish dilletante, Houseisland, disappeared. Street1 and El Squid were mildly entertaining, in a wild, monkey-like fashion, but they soon became rather tiresome. (Especially when they started flinging poo.)
Then the alarm clock went off and...
Daphne leapt out of bed, all flustered, started moving things from her cave into the cave next door, 'Do you mind if I lodge here for a while?' then she had to dash back and take the green slimy curtains down, move the drawers out of the rustic furniture, lug her bedding into the cave next door, dash back again and get those very new inventions called ELECTRIC things, unplug those, dash back to cave next door, shrieked, 'You got no plugs in here?'
Then threw some clothes on, no that was before she started moving things, then had some breakfast, doorbell went and in bowled the two lady decorators again ... then Daphne had to go and catch some food (she's got no man to do that for her, woe is her), dash back again and then a Pigeon text flew in, then a Pigeon phone went, then the Parchment Bank Statement arrived, and thankfully the lady decorators had made their own cup of tea ...
So with the morning not yet over, Daphne is absolutely shattered...
(And yes, this all
really happened
in my house !)
Enter stage right: El Squid, Panama hat and bamboo cane in tentacle, tap dancing furiously across the stage. Exit stge left.
Ta, da! :p
Enter stage left, waving at El Squid on the way, Daphne strolled to the middle of the stage and fainted, suffering from shock at the amount of Denticinarios she'd had to pay the lady decorators ...
And to her rescue came ...
And to her rescue came ...the next door cave dweller who happened to be a local...............
... Australopithecene, notorious for his good deeds and better nature. However, he was lacking in the spoken language department and the only thing he managed to get out were a series of grunts and high-pitched whistles. Not much help for the fiscally challenged Daphne, as he used berries and grub worms as coinage.
But, helpful he wanted to be, so ...
Australopithecene picked up a nearby bucket, filled it with ice water, stood over Daphne and..