Printable View
I was doing a rollout once at a factory and saw one of those signs with the circle and line thru it. The sign was to warn of the high pressure water hose used for cleaning the floor and not for drinking. The circle had a head, body and hose inside. The head had a jagged edge on it and chunks blowing out the back of it. I wish I had a camera.
Hey, Snommis69, if someone offers you a penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, do they give you change?
Had a user (looser) call the other day, saying he had an Athlon 700 and a Tbird 750........asked which one was faster
------------------
Two things are infinte: the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. - A. Einstein
Sign outside Dave's Meat Market: "You can't beat our meat but you can bust our chops."
A guy is the only survivor of a shipwreck and washes up on an island. After 6 months he wants sex badly and notices every day a sheep and a dog come out of the woods. He tries to approach the sheep figuring a sheep is better than nothing but the dog bites him all the time. This goes on for 6 months until one day he see an explosion in the distance, swims out to the boat and rescues a beautiful woman. After being rescued she says to him " I will do anything for you". As she says this the dog and sheep emerge and he looks at the woman and says "Hold the dog for me !!"
I read this in one of the broadsheets yesterday:
"Mr Johnstone, a student at the university of Wolverhampton, decided that it would be fun to moon at some of his friends from his third floor bedroom window. When he stood on the radiator and lowered his trousers, he slipped, and fell through the window, breaking several bones.
He is now sueing the university for failing to properly supervising his behaviour, and for not warning him of the dangers of falling through a third story window"
and this, which is a cracker:
"At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed a coastguard on the spot and asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied that he was sorry, but he didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had just blown his landrover off the cliff..."
Cad
-------
So this is how it feels to be potato salad...
I posted this one a few weeks ago and not many replies came back so I am reposting it again.
posted November 29, 2000 10:14 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Have you ever had a time when because one thing happened, whatever it may be, a whole bunch of crap happened in the background because of it. Funny thing happened today at the Office and I just had to share it with the rest of the Tech community. I'll try to explain it as best I can.
We had a Dell tech show up to service a laptop that had some issues today and I was busy so I couldn't go up and get it for him from the end user so I had someone call the user and he stated that he was leaving for the day so we can take his laptop and do whatever need to be done. Well the person that I had call this individual sent the Dell tech up to the clients cube "at least it used to be his cube" Tech came back down to IT with "A" laptop and proceded to start working on it. He ended up taking about 4 hours to fix it and he had to get going. I told him I would bring it back up to the user's desk for him and said see ya. When I got up to the Clients "old" cube (Mind you, I just got back from vacation and was unaware of the move" I noticed an empty cube. After asking a neighbor where the user moved to I went to his "new" cube that he just moved to and found that "HIS" laptop was still sitting in the docking station just like the user left it. I ran back down stairs to our area to find that the Dell tech had done like Elvis and "Left the Building". I also found out that security had been by earlier and asked if someone had seen a laptop that belonged to an outside sales rep who was onsight for the day. Hee Hee Meanwhile through all of this I also came to find that the reason I hadn't seen the network admin for the past few hours was because he was imaging a new laptop for the sales rep who thought his laptop was stolen. What a day. The best is going to be tomorrow when I have to tell the original end user that nothing was fixed on his laptop yesterday because someone forgot to update their phone list. What a mess...........Anyone else have a good one???
------------------
Sometimes I fill my tub up with milk and blow bubbles
P.S. The end user got a good laugh about it the next day and then nicely asked if his laptop would be fixed before the end of this year.
[This message has been edited by u8drtsox (edited December 06, 2000).]
hey FatalExceptionOE
Don't knock that user too bad. He may have been smarter than average. After all, an Athlon 600 is hella faster than a celeron 700. Probably the same kind of mistake. Now, stupid is the guy (ex co-worker) who had an A+ but fried a motherboard my putting the ATX power connector on wrong. Shoved the block in backwards (a little 7/4 in september).
------------------
Life isn't one damn thing after another, it's the same damn thing over and over.
I'm at a clients installing some software that "has never worked properly".
Nothing on the diskettes or manual say what OS they are for and she's right...you get to diskette number 2 and the error messages start. I start digging through the manual for their tech support figuring something is wrong in the way of a bad disk and I quote..
"In the unlikely event that you would need tech support, please re read the manual."
How's that for support? We finally dug up a phone number, called them only to be told that the developer winters in Florida and is unreachable. After much persuasion we were given a number and upon explaining the error code was told that he must have accidentally shipped her a version for win 3.1. It took her getting angry to get him to swap it out, he wanted to charge her full cost on a new set of disks.
------------------
Now...if I could only defrag my brain...
biker buddy had a new t-shirt. on the back it said .HONK IF YOU CAN READ THIS! THE DRUNK BITCH FELL OFF.i ask him where he got it.wife gave it to him for b-day.
You ever seen those signs that say "In case of fire, do not use elevators, use stairs." Why do they put those on the ground floor? If the building is on fire and I'm on the ground floor, you can bet your sweet bippy I'm not using the elevator OR the stairs, I'm using the FRONT DOOR!!!
------------------
R. Bret Walker, CNE
Wondering what videos to rent this weekend? Check out The People's Reviews, movie reviews written for the people and by the people.
"It's ironic, isn't it? The people who can think are so afraid of those who cannot."