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LOL Window Washer.
Most common ones I get are.
-Is that hard to install?
-In office how do I (Insert procedure which requires at least one component install)?
-In office how do I (Insert procedure which can be called off the pull down menu)?
-I could have done that. Why are you charging me $40?
Did ya ever get this one???
My Hard Drive Crashed, Can You Fix it?
I can look at it for you, what brand is it.
Its a (Maxel, sony, IBM, Fuji, Whatever)
Because they dont know the difference between
a Hard Disk Drive & a Floppy Disk Drive.
Also This (Whatever Program) Wont Run, it
says it only needs 32MB. I just upgraded to 20 Gigabyets... Duh, not even going there...
Thankfully, I don't do support anymore, but when I did, the absolute most common question was:
User: "@$#%! Why the @$#$ did you change my $%@ password? I need to get some &@*# work done here!"
Me: "Change the state of your caps lock key."
User: "%$&#! Do you think I'm %$&@* stupid? It's not that! Stop @#*$& jerking me around and change my password back!"
Me: "Please humor me. Check your caps lock key."
User: "Oh." *click*
Fortunately, I worked for a small IT department. Since the people calling me were fellow employees rather than customers, and since they all knew about my twisted sense of humor, I got away with being mean to them on occasion. :p
User: "My computer's broke! Fix it!"
Me: "Ok, I know exactly what the problem is."
User: "But I didn't even tell you yet. How can you...."
Me: "Your computer needs a user upgrade."
User: "Huh?"
Me: "Yep. Replace the user with a better one and I can guarantee your computer will function properly."
User: "Shut uuuuuuuuup! Why are you always so mean to me?"
Me: "I'm mean to everyone. Don't think you're special."
Always remember the acronym PEBKAC: Problem Exists Between Keyboard and Chair. :)
Yeh they do that because its easier than doing what you suggested.Quote:
Originally posted by LPetrarca:
Yeah I get those too. They ask for your advice, you take the time to explain to them, in pain-staking detail, what they need to do, then they go off and do something that their neighbor told them to try. Then, when that doesn't work and the machine's totally screwed, they come back to you looking for more advice!
:)
My personal Favorite is "Its not my fault that virus is on my computer"
"I am just after your expert advice"
But it doesn't matter what you tell them they have a friend that is a "whiz" on computers. They make out you know nothing even though they want your "expert opinion"
They S__T me
My Favorite of all “ I keep getting this blue screen, How do I fix it???”
And on my NT4.0 Workstations “Can you fix my DEFRAG???
-------------------------------------------------
Many people, when they run into a telephone pole, blame the pole!
:D
"I can't connect to the internet"."My father just worked on it"."What do you think"?"Dum de dum de dum,let me see".Go into control panel/network.Absolutely blank in network."well he's exercising parental control".
underseer,beautiful,I got to remember that one,"user upgrade". :D
i like these
"what version of windows are you running?"
"6.0"
and
"i just formatted my hard drive did i lose my email?"(nice time to ask)
and
"my modem doesnt work""when i push the button it doesnt turn on, and the cd's wont come out"
or i got this error when im online that says my computer is not optimised to view the website" (the add on different websites
oh i forgot one
"my monitor smells like it is burning can you fix it?"
my most frequently asked question has got to be "Why doesn't my printer work?" to which I normally reply
"put some paper in it/Change the toner cartridge"
This has been happening now at least once a day for the past few weeks now and to be quite truthfrul is beginning to drive me CRAZY!!!!!.
As I work internal support I usually get a variation on the following:
Can you re-set my password?
I forgot my password can you re-set it?
I wasn't sure of my password so I tried 3 times and now im locked out, can you unlock it?
Or if they are talking about home I get the old...
I want to get the internet at home. What do you recomend?
I want a PC. I only need it for typing documents and email. What can I get for £1500 - £2000? (<--- 2000!!! Blooming plebs)
What did you do? You just walk in here and it works, it don't like me......
Ahh, I weep for the future of industry, may the tech world flourish in StupidUserVille!
how about when I send out a message
We need to reboot the server.
"Can you wait until I finish typing my document?"
No, we need to reboot
Why?
Because we need to, that is why
"Will you wait til I am done?"
(this one happened yesterday, she spent more time arguing than time it would have taken to reboot, sad sad..
My favorite question is one I ask
Why God, Why?
I get this one at least once a week...
How do i switch this to landscape view in Excel?
Now, being one of two "Computer People" in the company i work for it IS part of my job description... but not to answer the SAME bloody question from the [B][I]SAME{/B}[/I} bloody person each week :eek: