I can fix stuff without touching it

This is a miraculous week for me. I've fixed seven things without actually touching them.

It started out when I installed a tape drive, and the customer complained that it wasn't working. I walked into the office, put in the tape, and it worked fine. Since then I've had a half-dozen other similiar cases.

Yesterday I was called to an office because the computer wouldn't turn off. I warned them that it would work as soon as I showed up, because I was in the zone this week. Sure enough, the problem disappeared as soon as I entered the room.

This morning a woman called because some software we sold her screwed up her Internet Explorer settings (we sold her Microsoft Office). I asked her to load up Internet Explorer and she did (after switching phones because she wasn't in the same room as the computer). Sure enough, everything was fine.

Every tech gets these calls every once in awhile, but this week has been flooded with them. Am I some sort of computer guru Are the custumers crying wolf because they want attention? Are they getting dumber?

I seem to get that too! Mine is with IBM computers and servers!

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OS/400...At least it's not Microsoft.

Ahh yeah!!

And speakers shall work as I apply power!

Monitors shall light as I apply power!

Modems shall work as I hang up the phone!

CD's shall read as I put shiny side down!

I shall demand payment and the customer will quit calling!

Savage my friend you are one part guru, the customers are one part cryin wolf and 98 parts getting dumber!! https://forums.windrivers.com/

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Microsoft is to software what McDonalds is to gourmet cooking!

Dale Earnhardt #3 (1951-2001)
You will be missed!

Its the IT aura, some times it's stronger than others, but all true techs have it! https://forums.windrivers.com/

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When you’re throwin’ your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.

( theme song from the outer limits ) DO NOT TRY TO ADJUST THE SETTINGS ON YOUR COMPUTER WE ARE IN CONTROL. FOR THE NEXT 30 SECONDS WE WILL CONTROL WHAT YOU SEE AND HEAR MUHAHAHAHAHA !

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( Elmer Fudd ) Be verwy verwy quiet , I'm huntin customers.

I as well have this and others notice it and know usually when I go to fix something there is nothing wrong with it when I am there.

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Your mother looks like a hampster and your father smells of elderberries!

I have pulled similar tricks before....

Printer messing up, I walk into the room, printer works OK, I leave, printer messes up, I come back, works Ok, leave, it messes up, I come back, it works Ok.

Not touching anything.... at this point, the librarians who had the printer were wondering at their own sanity... kept examining the garbled printouts for proof they were not insane...

I have had similar things happen on occasionally..

I have this weird power as well. Some people won't even let me look at their computer because they know very well the problem will disappear when I look at it.

But if those problems that disappear, you never know if it's really gone or whether it is lurking, ready to corrupt some important file the night before a deadline.

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"We're always behind industry standards" - Microsoft product manager Ed Suwanjindar

Sometimes we're magicians....not technicians!

I usually have to at least lay a hand on it, even if I don't actually do anything. I have the healing touch.

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I bet you're a real threat in the mucktuck-eating contest!

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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by CobraTekMax:
I usually have to at least lay a hand on it, even if I don't actually do anything. I have the healing touch.

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Happens a lot to me as well but I'm a Tech God things like this are to be expected....LOL



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Men's view of Women: All your sex are belong to us...
Women's view of Men: All your attention, time, and money are belong to us....

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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by SavagePenguin:
This is a miraculous week for me. I've fixed seven things without actually touching them.

It started out when I installed a tape drive, and the customer complained that it wasn't working. I walked into the office, put in the tape, and it worked fine. Since then I've had a half-dozen other similiar cases.

Yesterday I was called to an office because the computer wouldn't turn off. I warned them that it would work as soon as I showed up, because I was in the zone this week. Sure enough, the problem disappeared as soon as I entered the room.

This morning a woman called because some software we sold her screwed up her Internet Explorer settings (we sold her Microsoft Office). I asked her to load up Internet Explorer and she did (after switching phones because she wasn't in the same room as the computer). Sure enough, everything was fine.

Every tech gets these calls every once in awhile, but this week has been flooded with them. Am I some sort of computer guru Are the custumers crying wolf because they want attention? Are they getting dumber?

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I get this kinda stuff all the time. I think they just do something wrong...panic..call us give us the whole "its broken, i need help fast" routine, and we come over, do it right..and nothing happens

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If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then lets get wasted and have the time of our lives.

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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by sowulo:
Happens a lot to me as well but I'm a Tech God things like this are to be expected....LOL

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Ha ha! I am but a "mere" advanced tech. I will soon be a master, but just imagine my power when I acheive god status!

The world will be mine! All your computer are belong to me! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

*Cobra rubs his hands together evilly and smiles, as his eyes glaze over.*

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I bet you're a real threat in the mucktuck-eating contest!

Beware the UberUser......
I have met several people who actually make computers (and any complex electrical equipment) break by just walking into the room.
I have seen it happen.... blue screens that ONLY happen when this user is on the machine (they didn't do anything unusual).... Random crashes and lockups REGARDLESS of where the box was, as long as they're within a couple of meters of it....
It seems to depend on how much technofear the UberUser exhibits.

The trick to techie guruhood is to SHOW NO FEAR.

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Have you tried reading the manual?

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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by jay015:
Sometimes we're magicians....not technicians!</font>

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My answer to all problems like that is "ITS MAGIC!!!"

I can do that with servers too, I just walk into the room and say "Okay ladies breaks over" and bang they are up and running. I guess it's like Fonzie from happy day's.

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This is what we were trained to do, NOW SUCK IT UP!!!

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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by CobraTekMax:
I usually have to at least lay a hand on it, even if I don't actually do anything. I have the healing touch.

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i always liked the "laying of hands" method, i usually give it a good rub(the machine perv) and then hand them my ULC card...hehe..i love the look on their faces



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""in certain cases...one remains a philosopher only by being silent." -Friedrich Neitzsche "

Just happened today, get a call my printer doesn't work. Walk into there office and BAM the laser jet starts. I'm a legend in my own mind and obviously the printer knew it.

I think it's a little like when the cow sees the veterinary surgeon pulling on the long rubber glove .... all of a sudden they feel MUCH better !

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Still scrambling up the learning curve ...

The streak continues.
After posting that I got a call from a business who's email wasn't working.

Me: Open Outlook Express
Them: Ok.
Me: Click the "Send/Receive" button and tell me what message you get.
Them: Ok. Hey... it's working now.
Me: You're welcome. Have a nice day.

I hung up and told my wife that I had the golden tough. She rolled her eyes at me. She does that a lot.

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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by SavagePenguin:
The streak continues.
After posting that I got a call from a business who's email wasn't working.

Me: Open Outlook Express
Them: Ok.
Me: Click the "Send/Receive" button and tell me what message you get.
Them: Ok. Hey... it's working now.
Me: You're welcome. Have a nice day.

I hung up and told my wife that I had the golden tough. She rolled her eyes at me. She does that a lot.

</font>

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Yeah, had one of those today too but there is one BIG problem with this. These kind of repairs don't pay a whole lot. LOL

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Men's view of Women: All your sex are belong to us...
Women's view of Men: All your attention, time, and money are belong to us....

Hey, I've done the same thing a couple of times!! AlienDyne is magic!!!!! https://forums.windrivers.com/ https://forums.windrivers.com/ https://forums.windrivers.com/

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March 25, 1821 - March 25, 2001
180 years have passed since the Greek Revolution.
180 years of being free, 180 years of being proud!

"We are enslaved and we suffer, but we will never stop following our forefathers' steps" - Rigas Velestinlis (Dec 12, 1790)

My Hardware Info, Hardware Media and Computer History page

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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by SavagePenguin:
I hung up and told my wife that I had the golden tough. She rolled her eyes at me. She does that a lot.

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My wife would roll her eyes if I said I had a golden tough too.. https://forums.windrivers.com/

Back to the subject though... on the flip side of the coin. I once walked through a room full of NT workstations, as I passed by the artists started to curse, 4 out of 7 workstations just BSOD'ed. That's more my level of luck. https://forums.windrivers.com/

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And Control Enter STILL wont let me post a reply.
:)

The other day I was in one of my rare silly moods. A user called saying his printer wouldn't work. When I got there, the display was flashing "Printer needs Attention". The user said he turned the printer off and on a few times, but couldn't get rid of the error message. So I leaned close to the printer and started whispering sweet nothings to it and softly stroking it.. gently turned it off and on....OnLine..
I just smiled at the user and said something like, "Next time it asks for attention, give it!" and walked out...

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There are only two things in life, but I forgot what they are. --John Hiatt

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<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by scutterboy:
My wife would roll her eyes if I said I had a golden tough too.. https://forums.windrivers.com/
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My girlfriend says I have the golden touch....

I might have told this story before:
For about a month, one workstation on a net would fail to connect to the server about 3x a week. I would try some stuff over the phone and ultimately go in. Each time I sat down and typed "net show" (an old lantastic command...) and walla, everything working. After a month of this, one day the user just started ranting, "I hate this #@$#@%$@%$$ computer." I turned and quietly asked her if she often talked this way to her computer. She answered, "Yes, this thing is a real piece of #$@$%!" I suggested that maybe that was the problem. That her computer had feelings too and simply needed a little positive attention. I told her to give it a name and apologize. She came over, apologized, named it George, kissed the top of the monitor, and never had the problem again......

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Men's view of Women: All your sex are belong to us...
Women's view of Men: All your attention, time, and money are belong to us....

When that happens to me and they ask how I did it or what did I flip my hands around it and say "be healed". Works for me.....isn't that strange how that happens tho?

https://forums.windrivers.com/

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Ever stop to think....and forget to start again?

As I've always said:

Machines are people, too! https://forums.windrivers.com/

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If this is reality - I want the drugs back NOW!

They call me "Magic Tech" at work because a customer will call in having been frustrated at their computer all day long, only to have it work properly *while* I'm on the phone with them.

I guess some guys got it, some guys don't! https://forums.windrivers.com/

Does the Dolphin roll her eyes like the smiley https://forums.windrivers.com/ ? https://forums.windrivers.com/

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#include &lt;disclaimer.h&gt;: I didn't do it, nobody saw me, you can't prove anything, I swear I checked her ID first! Oh, and the opinions expressed herein are my own and not those of my employer.

[This message has been edited by parning (edited March 23, 2001).]

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Originally posted by cordon:
Beware the UberUser......
I have met several people who actually make computers (and any complex electrical equipment) break by just walking into the room.
I have seen it happen.... blue screens that ONLY happen when this user is on the machine (they didn't do anything unusual).... Random crashes and lockups REGARDLESS of where the box was, as long as they're within a couple of meters of it....

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Mobile Phone perhaps? Just wondering...

Its kinda wierd when you walk by one computer and fix it but when you do it on a regular basis its damn freaky. It happens at least 4 times a week. You see the symtom, you try to recreate it and poof its gone.
I had a machine where the bios and video card were conflicting with WIN98SE and I restarted it and it was gone. weird

I love days like that. When the user complains...they call one o the techs. If the tech can't do a damn thing with it, they call me. I walk in, give the monitor the "Gaze of Doom" that portrays my thoughts ("I will not hesitate to scrap your @ss!") then I sit down...it boots, it logs onto the network, and all is well. Many have asked how I do it. My reply is,"Intimidation. The computer knows when it's beat. That...or they're scared what I'm going to do with the mallet I placed beside the tower." :D

Two words: REMOTE ADMINISTRATION

Novell ZENworks rules! You can do just about anything to another workstation without even getting up! Don't tell anyone though, makes for great job security!

That happens to me all too often. A patron will come up to me and give me some sad story about how they hit the print button and the printer still won't print. I usually walk over to the printer and give it a little pat (as long as the lights are flahing ;) ) and it will start right up within seconds. What they don't understand is that it sometimes takes the network printers a little time to respond to the large tasks. Or sometimes I just walk by the computer and "all of a sudden" its working again. I had one today.

-- I can't get into Word!

So I promptly run over to the computer and double click the word icon and bang it comes up. I just love the look on the patrons' faces when it works for me but everything they tried failed.

We have one kid who comes in everyday though that is the touch of death for these poor computers. I swear he can freeze them just by looking at them. 9 in one hour!

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Originally posted by Reality:
We have one kid who comes in everyday though that is the touch of death for these poor computers. I swear he can freeze them just by looking at them. 9 in one hour!

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He's the embodied ghost of the luddite movement!!!!!

It's not IT aura, it's static electricity.

Happens a lot to me, also in reverse... I had a Micron PC a while back that I stripped completely... no POST, no Video, just power up and sit there. So, I give up after 1.5 hours on the bench. I have replaced every part but the motherboard, and so it must be the motherboard right?

So I tell junior tech to reassemble the system w/customer's original parts and call them w/the bad news. He does so, and turns on computer HELLO Windows 95 desktop no problems with this computer for 6 months now. Go figure.