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El Batcho
El Batcho "Monday, HA HA HA, you had days of the week, we were too poor to have days of the week, everyday was Ughnesday day and we had 9 day's in the week back then, that was before the Hun took two of them from us. We would get up 15 min's before we went to bed and then spend most of the day licking gravel of the road so the fancy rich folk wouldn't get dirty, that was just the begining or Ughnesday"
POOR! I made the term poor! We could even afford vowels! We just had MND. We could even keep "y" they wanted a luxery tax for it. To make matters worse we didn't even have tounges to lick the dirt off, Yeah it was the Huns. Bastards took'em from us.
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[quote]Originally posted by ßracius:
<strong>El Batcho "Monday, HA HA HA, you had days of the week, we were too poor to have days of the week, everyday was Ughnesday day and we had 9 day's in the week back then, that was before the Hun took two of them from us. We would get up 15 min's before we went to bed and then spend most of the day licking gravel of the road so the fancy rich folk wouldn't get dirty, that was just the begining or Ughnesday"
POOR! I made the term poor! We could even afford vowels! We just had MND. We could even keep "y" they wanted a luxery tax for it. To make matters worse we didn't even have tounges to lick the dirt off, Yeah it was the Huns. Bastards took'em from us.</strong><hr></blockquote>Luxery, pure unadulterated Luxery, when I was a lad I had to walk on my hands all the way to school since all able legs were needed for the war against the Hun, and all we had to write with at school was onions, and not those fancy red ones but them horrible moldy ones that everyone leaves at the store, then I would roll home through 8ft of snow, up hill to the cardbord box I used to live in and wat for me da to come blugen us with the short end of a 2x4.
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School! I had to walk uphill both ways on my hands while using MY feet (and I'm not a chimp) to fight Rabid Aardvarks, Pycho Llamas, and The Huns. Not to mention the broken glass and the 9 feet of snow in the middle of summer during a 100 degree heat wave with a weggie that would give Carson a sore rump! Umpph!
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[quote]Originally posted by ßracius:
<strong>School! I had to walk uphill both ways on my hands while using MY feet (and I'm not a chimp) to fight Rabid Aardvarks, Pycho Llamas, and The Huns. Not to mention the broken glass and the 9 feet of snow in the middle of summer during a 100 degree heat wave with a weggie that would give Carson a sore rump! Umpph!</strong><hr></blockquote>Pure folly me lad, I had to crawl on my shaved belly acroos broken glass, though 10 foot of snow in the middle of summer durring a 115 degree heat wave, and a wedgie, I lived for days I had wedgie, I normaly had a pair of razor wire undies on because the hun had stolen all the potatoe sacks to make uniforms. I used to have to go to school, which wasn't really school, but a beat your self with a criket bat camp, then I used to have to eat lunch which was dried worms and charcole, then crawl all the way home on me bleeding belly to sit by Nana and make sure her blader pipe wasn't blocked my blowing air into it. And that was just Xmas day.
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What we would have given for some rotten fruit. And a cardboard house, in my day, we didn't have them fancy cardboard mansions, we slept in the shade of the pygmy Antarctic Walrus-Aardvark...for dinner we just chewed on some rocks for the local mining company...and we liked it that way
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You think you had it rough my chimp friend. I had to sleep next to JMM. I still get a nervious eye twick when someone mentions "mini-sauage". http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/eek3.gif
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[quote]Originally posted by cleetus:
<strong>What we would have given for some rotten fruit. And a cardboard house, in my day, we didn't have them fancy cardboard mansions, we slept in the shade of the pygmy Antarctic Walrus-Aardvark...for dinner we just chewed on some rocks for the local mining company...and we liked it that way</strong><hr></blockquote>
A pygmy Antartic Walrus-Aardvark, well Mr la dee da fancy pants, what I would give for one of those, and shade, next to the surface of the sun my home town was the hotest in the universe, and you had minig rocks, well whay not ave a steak with them, we had suicde pills for dinner every night and that was just fine with us.
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Pygmy Antartic Walrus-Aardvark's, home towns, cardboard boxes?! Why you guys were lucky! I live in a hole at the bottom of a polluted lake. Rocks for dinner, I could only dream about such a feast. All I could afford to eat was dust and the chemical byproducts that floated by outside my hole, and I felt lucky to have them.
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[quote]Originally posted by Kymera:
<strong>Pygmy Antartic Walrus-Aardvark's, home towns, cardboard boxes?! Why you guys were lucky! I live in a hole at the bottom of a polluted lake. Rocks for dinner, I could only dream about such a feast. All I could afford to eat was dust and the chemical byproducts that floated by outside my hole, and I felt lucky to have them.</strong><hr></blockquote>A hole, where were you the south or france, want a gold plated spoon with that hole, we didn't even have a hole we wer so poor. We just used to imagine a hole and that was good enough for us.
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Did I menton the JMM part?
Holes, dust, rocks, sun, and artic circles! Elite! Your all snoobie! I had to sleep in gerbil poop, that is if we could find some! Not only that but any Space Monkey droppings we found we taken from us by Joan and Carson! We could only think of finding a cold wet hole to sleep in. It was the sewage planet for us and they would only let us sleep in the collection chamber. Lucky bastards!
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Gerbil poop?! What are you of royal blood? I would kill for something so soft and delicious. Nothing but rusty razor blades for my bed. Everyday I would be woken up by the run off from the rubbing alcohol factory and told to clean the automatic fish degutter with a toothbrush. Space monkey droppings indeed. No need to flaunt your opulence your majesty.
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[quote]Originally posted by Kymera:
<strong>Gerbil poop?! What are you of royal blood? I would kill for something so soft and delicious. Nothing but rusty razor blades for my bed. Everyday I would be woken up by the run off from the rubbing alcohol factory and told to clean the automatic fish degutter with a toothbrush. Space monkey droppings indeed. No need to flaunt your opulence your majesty.</strong><hr></blockquote>Run off from the rubbing alcohol factory, oh how wonderful at least you had run off, we were woken by shells from the army since we lived on the bomb range at the bottom of a pond will with urine samples that have lost there lables, just keep bragging princess "I'm so rich"
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[quote]Originally posted by ElBatcho:
<strong>Run off from the rubbing alcohol factory, oh how wonderful at least you had run off, we were woken by shells from the army since we lived on the bomb range at the bottom of a pond will with urine samples that have lost there lables, just keep bragging princess "I'm so rich"</strong><hr></blockquote>
Sleep! HA! We couldn't even afford to sleep! We had to work 24 to clean the scum pipes at the local scum factory. Which by the way take make the "liquid" in those little Vieanna Sauage tins.
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You were saying sleep. I thought you were saying beat. I don't even know what a sleep is, but I get beat 8 hours a night with a spiked bat. I used to wish that I could clean scum, then I would have it made. I have to be satisfied with muck, which is better known as Spam jelly.
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[quote]Originally posted by ßracius:
<strong>
Sleep! HA! We couldn't even afford to sleep! We had to work 24 to clean the scum pipes at the local scum factory. Which by the way take make the "liquid" in those little Vieanna Sauage tins.</strong><hr></blockquote> 24 hours, I laugh at you rich mans 24 hours, we used to have dickity doo hours a day, and that was because the Thuggy Cult of India stole the number 8 from us. We used to work dickity doo hours a day and then were beat into a coma for a couple of hours then were sent back to the lemon mines of east western Slrolokivastinebug.
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Hah, we had to watch the Rosey O'donnel show all the time, until we had time taken from us...our eyes perpetually held open like in a bad clockwork orange type thing
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SPAM, Cults, beatings! Buw ha ha! Softies. We were forced to watch 9 hours of "Little house on the Prairie"!
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T.V oh just la dee da and roses, we used to have to get midgets to dance and sing for our amusment, and that was for about 2 seconds every hundred years.
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9 hours of "Little house on the Prairie", you were lucky. I had the original Power Rangers act out live shows of plays they wrote on bar napkins 52 hours a day. I thanked my lucky stars that I wasn't on my usual 60 hour days. 9 hours would be a vacation.
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[quote]Originally posted by ElBatcho:
<strong>T.V oh just la dee da and roses, we used to have to get midgets to dance and sing for our amusment, and that was for about 2 seconds every hundred years.</strong><hr></blockquote>
Ha...Midgets. Actually that's pretty funny! We had midgets that were midgets compared to real midgets, that just fidget while we made widgets.
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[quote]Originally posted by MorticiaAddams:
<strong>http://www.contrabandent.com/cwm/s/c...ackeye/lol.gif
Can you say funnier then hell..
You guys tore me up.. http://www.contrabandent.com/cwm/s/o...xxrotflmao.gif</strong><hr></blockquote>
Well with that avatar back I..........
Ahem! Back in my dau we could even laugh! Some big brute would come over and flick us in the left eye.
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Did I miss a Monty Python marathon this week??
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[quote]Originally posted by *MAYHEM*:
<strong>Did I miss a Monty Python marathon this week??</strong><hr></blockquote>
Oh Monty Python well aren't we the little prince everything, when I was a boy monty pythons attacked you on the way to school, horrible creatures with sharp pointy teeth and large fuzzy feet, arrrrrrrh yes those were the days, often I would wish for death as I was butaly beeten by loveless tea women.
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[quote]Originally posted by ElBatcho:
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Oh Monty Python well aren't we the little prince everything, when I was a boy monty pythons attacked you on the way to school, horrible creatures with sharp pointy teeth and large fuzzy feet, arrrrrrrh yes those were the days, often I would wish for death as I was butaly beeten by loveless tea women.</strong><hr></blockquote>
Tea Woman! I was beat by a homosexiual Sumo wrestler with bad eye sight! http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/boohoo.gif
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I've noticed you sig for some time now El Batcho. Did you know that her real name is Joan Molinski? She had it changed to enter the spot light. Just thought you might be interested in that useless fact. :p
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[quote]Originally posted by Akuma:
<strong>I've noticed you sig for some time now El Batcho. Did you know that her real name is Joan Molinski? She had it changed to enter the spot light. Just thought you might be interested in that useless fact. :p </strong><hr></blockquote>
Thats her taliban name, I have a bio on my website all about joan, still working on most of the facts but here's the link.
<a href="http://www.elbatcho.freeservers.com/Joan.htm" target="_blank">Truth about Joan</a>
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Name changes, we weren't even allowed names back in my day, we were just called by what ever sound might be made when beating us, as we made no sounds because we were to poor for vocal cords.
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Vocal chords, pish posh, we didn't have vocal chords mr fancy pants we had to use two rock and bang them together to talk to each other.
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Vocal chords and noise, BAH! Back in the good ol days we didn't even have air in Canada to make noise with, we were so poor, we had to beg and steal to get air from wherever we could. And when we finally got air, our government had to import most of it from the USA and charges us the O2IT (Oxygen Inhalation Tax) which I wouldn't mind but all the air from the USA that we get in Ontario is filthy and it also makes acid rain that eats holes in our umbrellas, destroys our igloos, and leaves us wet and homeless.
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Umbrella's and Igloo's!!!! What is up with that mister High and Mighty Rich Man!! God must be your right hand man to be able to have umbrella's and igloo's! :D :p :D
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[quote]Originally posted by Akuma:
<strong>Umbrella's and Igloo's!!!! What is up with that mister High and Mighty Rich Man!! God must be your right hand man to be able to have umbrella's and igloo's! :D :p :D </strong><hr></blockquote>Smiley faces on post, mister I'm a high and mighty internet god, back when I was a boy we didn't have the internet, we had a rat, a piece of paper, a shoe lace and two know it all Retarded dwarf Yenta's who gave us all our information, and they were worong all the time but it was good enough for us and thats the way we liked it.
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You had paper?! You were lucky. We had to send welt braille messages. We hit each other in the head with rocks until someone passed out, and they would be our paper. If you got one message a month you were glad to have it.
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[quote]Originally posted by Kymera:
<strong>You had paper?! You were lucky. We had to send welt braille messages. We hit each other in the head with rocks until someone passed out, and they would be our paper. If you got one message a month you were glad to have it.</strong><hr></blockquote>
Glad! We didn't even have glad in my day. We just went around with out any emotions. We could even afford a smile or frown. Buncha sissies
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Wow, I still say you all are lucky. We didn't even have language where I grew up. Hell, we didn't even get to grow up. It wasn't intill Michael Jackson took me away to perform "stuff" on me that I was allowed to speak. We were so poor we couldn't even complain about being poor. And we liked it that way....
:D :D
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[quote]Originally posted by Quiet Thunder:
<strong>Wow, I still say you all are lucky. We didn't even have language where I grew up.</strong><hr></blockquote>
Grunt grunt oink gesture ooga booga! :D
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[quote]Originally posted by Wayward Clam:
<strong>
Grunt grunt oink gesture ooga booga! :D </strong><hr></blockquote>
Oh look at you Mr foreign tounge, speaking your la-dee-da french talk, in my day we only had one word for everything and we were all called the same thing, in fact it wasn't a word at all it was a just a ^ and this was everthing, entire books were writen like this "^^^ ^^^^^ ^^ ^^ ^^^" it pronounced gurmp and thats the way we like it.
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[quote]Originally posted by ElBatcho:
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Oh look at you Mr foreign tounge, speaking your la-dee-da french talk, in my day we only had one word for everything and we were all called the same thing, in fact it wasn't a word at all it was a just a ^ and this was everthing, entire books were writen like this "^^^ ^^^^^ ^^ ^^ ^^^" it pronounced gurmp and thats the way we like it.</strong><hr></blockquote>
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
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[quote]Originally posted by ElBatcho:
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Oh look at you Mr foreign tounge, speaking your la-dee-da french talk, in my day we only had one word for everything and we were all called the same thing, in fact it wasn't a word at all it was a just a ^ and this was everthing, entire books were writen like this "^^^ ^^^^^ ^^ ^^ ^^^" it pronounced gurmp and thats the way we like it.</strong><hr></blockquote>
Who had books! Like I said, we didn't have language. We just had to point to stuff. That is point when we were allowed to. We could only wish we had a ^. Did I mention the part about Michael Jackson? Oh yea, and we had to walk to the nuclear testing site (place we got food) everyday uphill (bothways) in 5 1/2 feet of snow.
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[quote]Originally posted by Quiet Thunder:
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Who had books! Like I said, we didn't have language. We just had to point to stuff. That is point when we were allowed to. We could only wish we had a ^. Did I mention the part about Michael Jackson? Oh yea, and we had to walk to the nuclear testing site (place we got food) everyday uphill (bothways) in 5 1/2 feet of snow.</strong><hr></blockquote>
Ha! Atleast you had snow. Just to tease us they would throw instant mashed potatos on the ground and watch us get excited and then spray water on it. You ever get Mashed potatos in your butt crack?
