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Top 10 things...
NOT to do in TEXAS (This is just for fun)
10. Do NOT make fun of our president
9. Do NOT pick Bluebonnets by the highway or any other street
8. Do NOT go out drinking and think you can drink a Texan under the table
7. Do NOT litter
6. Do NOT try and speak Spanish, you’ll sound silly and you’ll have about 20 Mexicans running to kick you azz and there is nothing we can do about it.
5. Do NOT try to copy our dialect, we like visitors and we treat you nice. Don’t screw it up by acting like a dumb SOB
4. Do NOT litter
3. Have a good time
2. If you get a girl pregnant down here either A) Move to Texas or B) Make your Will
1. Do NOT bring your Honda Civic with spoiler fin, K&E filter, NOS stickers and sissy crap to Texas. We will kick your azz and use your car as a hood ordainment.
Oh! BTW if you want to fit in say “Hook’em horns!” Every 30 minutes
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Unless in any other city in Texas, other than Austin, then say "Gig 'em Aggies"
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AH! Blasphemy! Ignore him! Now I must wash my eyes with gasoline for looking apon that word!
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Oh, so how is ol' Chris "chokes at the Big12 game" Simms doin?
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[quote]Originally posted by cleetus:
<strong>Oh, so how is ol' Chris "chokes at the Big12 game" Simms doin?</strong><hr></blockquote>
MF CHRIS "I AM A CRYING BABY" SIMMS. WHAT A WASTE OF TIME THAT LITTLE C**KS*CKER IS! BOO HOO I HURT MY FINGER. LITTLE **SSY! HIS DADDY NEEDS TO KEEP OUT OF THE GAME AND LET THE HORNS DO WHAT THE NEED TO DO. OH! DID YOU HEAR WHAT HE HAD THE BALLS TO SAY! "I AM GOING PRO!" LOL! I NEARLY CRAPPED MY PANTS WHEN I HEARD THAT CRAP!
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2. If you get a girl pregnant down here either A) Move to Texas or B) Make your Will
if i get a girl pregnant out there can i take her back to live with me in the city ? :D
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Buw ha ha ha ha, I left myself open for that one.
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The Best Things out of Texas?
1 The Interstate!
2 Airline ticket to the real world!
3 Fast Grayhound Bus!
:D J/K :D
1 My Wife is from Texas
2 One of my Daughters has a ranch
out side San Antone!
Worst thing about Texas?
The Dallas CowPies!
:D :D :D
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I lived in Houston for 4 years designing subsea oilfield equipment. Woo-hoo! Anyway, the food was great and the traffic lousy. I don't miss it... :D
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My wife is also from Texas, and she always talks about moving back there.
Whenever she mentions it, though, I remind her about that summer a few years back. It was so hot they had to close the freeways because the asphalt was too soft.
We could always just move to hell, might be a bit crowded, but the rent would be cheap...
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[quote]Originally posted by Spaceman Spiff:
<strong>I lived in Houston for 4 years designing subsea oilfield equipment. Woo-hoo! Anyway, the food was great and the traffic lousy. I don't miss it... :D </strong><hr></blockquote>
I spent a night in the Shamrock Texas Jail
Charged with riding my Harley and having Long Hair!
Actually it was for breaking a lone star beer bottle in the rib joint parking lot. (Fell off my bike seat while I was puttin on my leathers)
Fine: $250.00 1 day in jail (time served) and get the hell outa Shamrock! And Don't come back ya hear!
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[quote]Originally posted by Dr.J:
<strong>
I spent a night in the Shamrock Texas Jail
Charged with riding my Harley and having Long Hair!
Actually it was for breaking a lone star beer bottle in the rib joint parking lot. (Fell off my bike seat while I was puttin on my leathers)
Fine: $250.00 1 day in jail (time served) and get the hell outa Shamrock! And Don't come back ya hear!</strong><hr></blockquote>
Yeah, the cops and state troopers REALLY REALLY REALLY love their jobs.
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Heh heh,.. I know nothing about Texas. I'm a California boy! Surf's up dude! :D
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Why would I want to say "Hook 'em horns"? You Texans need to stay out of the sun.
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[quote]Originally posted by Kymera:
<strong>Why would I want to say "Hook 'em horns"? You Texans need to stay out of the sun.</strong><hr></blockquote>
<a href="http://www.mackbrown-texasfootball.com/" target="_blank">Click Me!</a> :D
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Amarillo Design Bureau, the company that made Star Fleet Battles and the game based on it, Star Fleet Command, is a Texan company... that alone wins my respect... :D
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[quote]Originally posted by Wayward Clam:
<strong>Amarillo Design Bureau, the company that made Star Fleet Battles and the game based on it, Star Fleet Command, is a Texan company... that alone wins my respect... :D </strong><hr></blockquote>
Eat overloaded disruptors, clam boy!!! :D
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Hey Don't knock Texas
if it wasn't for Texas we would never have found out who shot JR
and I seem to remember a famous Debbie from texas...now that really put Dallas on the map
and if it wasn't for Texas oil we would have to Kow Tow to saddam.......
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And also, don't forget about Texaco. It almost sounds like Texas therefore another reason Texas is cool. If I were from Texas I would want to be called, "Tex". That would be cool. But since I'm not from Texas, I guess my name would have to be, "Cal". BTW,.. nevermind my jibberish all, I'm just bored outta my friggin skull this lovely sunny Friday afternoon, and I gotta post somethin! :D
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You know what's left after you kick the $hit out of a Texican? Hm-m-m-m-m?? His boots. Just his boots... Yee-Haw!
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