bloody police

Was pulled over last night by a copper who'd followed me for a couple
of miles and breathalysed. Bearing in mind I could barely stand it was no surprise to find I was massively over the limit.
This was particularly disgraceful as I had the missus and kiddie with me in
the car. I was arrested and read my rights. It was all a very salutary
experience, especially when the copper got shirty because I found the
whole business side-splittingly funny.
His mate, whilst the arrest took place, went and had a good look round the
car, came back and started whispering to the other copper. They are
whispering frantically at each other and neither of them look very pleased.
Copper turns to me and starts accusing me of wasting police time, he calls
me a tw*t.
I point out he's just sworn at a member of the public, in front of an 18
month
old child and that I'll report him for conduct unbecoming. Plod got back
in their car and drive off, with the copper who'd had a look round my
car laughing his head off.







And the moral of the story for the police
is........................






















Always check whether a car is left or right hand drive

:mult:

Classic. :thumbs:

So is this like your 'other one' or is it real ? ;) ..

btw its 'compulsory' for them to do a PNC first on any moving traffic violation incase you are on some 'exclusion' or wanted list, so they should know before stopping you if it was left or right hand drive ..besides being able to actually see !

Quote:

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Originally Posted by confus-ed

So is this like your 'other one' or is it real ? ;) ..

btw its 'compulsory' for them to do a PNC first on any moving traffic violation incase you are on some 'exclusion' or wanted list, so they should know before stopping you if it was left or right hand drive ..besides being able to actually see !

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tis a joke,,

note when "the ministry" pull u at the side of the road , for a "free MOT" and a diesel/boot check ,
big mistake in the northwest ,,,,using traffic wardens (to save money)

traffic wardens (civilian) = stationaryy offences
police offices = moving and stationary offences ,,,


smile at the traffic warden , run him over if nessesary (if not waring a yellow jacket ,,,,,,legaly req),,,and drive away ,,,

now you know what a traffic warden can do (not stop you for driving down a one way st ,,,but book you if you park there) ,,,,and when you can legaly run them over,


i love traffic wardens ,,,

Quote:

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Originally Posted by freddy

.. i love traffic wardens ,,,

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Only squashed ones though ! :D

btw they are entitled & instructed to note any moving traffic violations & report that for potential latter punishment dealt with at court, but I'm not 100% whether they can now 'do you' or not, I think you are definately right in 'couldn't nick you' .. but with those new 'plastic police' (those god damned silly Community support officers) I'm not absolutely sure whether they didn't get their powers extended too ?

Can I borrow your name for this one confus-ed?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by meatwad

Can I borrow your name for this one confus-ed?

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But of course :thumbs: .. everyone is allowed to be at least a little confus-ed some of the time ! :)

The brief gist is that over here the poor old motorist gets used as a source of taxation for any driving faults they might have/make as its very easy to extract cash from someone who's basically legal but might occasionally speed or perhaps ill -advisedly drive home having had three pints instead of the none/one/two (if you are physically big enough) pints of beer that are permitted here before you'd get what I think you call 'drunk in charge' ? (or similar anyway ;)) - while if you steal a car, run around in it all day with 20 police officers & a helicopter after you & kill someone or just wreak havoc, you are off to some holiday camp or get a slap on the wrists, or get the the driving license you never had in the first place taken off you !

So the summary is that folks who are generally mostly legal but perhaps 'erred' get hit far harder than those who never gave a monkeys & were way outside the law - NOT FAIR for a two word summary (but I thought that might leave you even more confus-ed than you originally were :thumbs: )

Quote:

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Originally Posted by confus-ed

But of course :thumbs: .. everyone is allowed to be at least a little confus-ed some of the time ! :)

The brief gist is that over here the poor old motorist gets used as a source of taxation for any driving faults they might have/make as its very easy to extract cash from someone who's basically legal but might occasionally speed or perhaps ill -advisedly drive home having had three pints instead of the none/one/two (if you are physically big enough) pints of beer that are permitted here before you'd get what I think you call 'drunk in charge' ? (or similar anyway ;)) - while if you steal a car, run around in it all day with 20 police officers & a helicopter after you & kill someone or just wreak havoc, you are off to some holiday camp or get a slap on the wrists, or get the the driving license you never had in the first place taken off you !

So the summary is that folks who are generally mostly legal but perhaps 'erred' get hit far harder than those who never gave a monkeys & were way outside the law - NOT FAIR for a two word summary (but I thought that might leave you even more confus-ed than you originally were :thumbs: )

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It did make me more confus-ed. But I figered it out anyway. The dude wasn't driving. Once that kicked in I rolled on the floor laughing.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by meatwad

It did make me more confus-ed. But I figered it out anyway. The dude wasn't driving. Once that kicked in I rolled on the floor laughing.

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He-he-he .. done it again & not on purpose ! :rolleyes: :grin: - all that bit above is why Freddy is 'moaning about it' (its a joke but based on the dumbness of our motoring laws) - but it never clicked with me that as all your cars are left hand drive & we to you 'drive on the wrong side' you wouldn't have 'quite' got that bit :thumbs2:

I suppose a bit of confus-ed-ness for a bonus giggle ;)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by confus-ed

He-he-he .. done it again & not on purpose ! :rolleyes: :grin: - all that bit above is why Freddy is 'moaning about it' (its a joke but based on the dumbness of our motoring laws) - but it never clicked with me that as all your cars are left hand drive & we to you 'drive on the wrong side' you wouldn't have 'quite' got that bit :thumbs2:

I suppose a bit of confus-ed-ness for a bonus giggle ;)

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got to laugh at this one ,,,,prisioner on remand ,,,,,home for weekend

http://www.wanadoo.co.uk/news/nation...UK&link=link_8

:rolleyes: ..:( - that's definately a 'joke' but not a funny one !

Quote:

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..Police are continuing their hunt for a man who was mistakenly released from Manchester's Strangeways Prison earlier this week.

Police in Manchester, northwest England, urged the public not to approach 22-year-old Bobby Phipps, who is facing six charges of attempted murder..

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I live in a brilliant country in some ways, but stuff like this just makes you want to emigrate .. that's terrible ! ( & I bet nobody even gets sacked/disclipined over that fiasco - if he does anything whilst unexpectedly free they {whichever idiot(s) caused this} want shoving in a cell with him !)

nice one freddy - gotta love cut'n paste :D

As for the rest of it - life sucks, the more you try to do it right, the more obstacles there are, yet do it wrong and people are all over you trying to help because you had a bad background/didn't know better/traumatised by the 20th Century.

As for the rest of it - life sucks, the more you try to do it right, the more obstacles there are, yet do it wrong and people are all over you trying to help because you had a bad background/didn't know better/traumatised by the 20th Century.

I dont know how you have the time to complain NooNoo you mustnt have seen your tax bill yet.
It would seem that if you want things to improve you should step out the system and join the huge Black Economy in this country. You either feed the system or feed off it.

I and many friends have discovered that now if we work more than 50hrs a week it is pointless, it all goes in tax and deductions.

I was talking about bringing up two kids in spite of a drunk for a husband, who magically sobers up and tells the family court I am a bad mother.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by confus-ed

So is this like your 'other one' or is it real ? ;) ..

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Come on ed, did you even have to ask??? The whole story only had 2 commas in it.............it was obvious freddy copied & pasted it!!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by 3fingersa


lute

Come on ed, did you even have to ask??? The whole story only had 2 commas in it.............it was obvious freddy copied & pasted it!!

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it.............it

less than you

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Quote:

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Originally Posted by freddy

it.............it

less than you

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:grin: :butt: :grin:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by NooNoo

I was talking about bringing up two kids in spite of a drunk for a husband, who magically sobers up and tells the family court I am a bad mother.

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Sorry Bev different ball game - didnt realise.

You will be delighted with the CSA performance then?

Bet he sobers up when he thinks you want a cheque.

Sometimes I look at life from the bottom of the bottle, particularly when the job gets me stressed out. I know its not the answer. By the same score my wife and family require to be kept in the manner which they are accustomed to and I see that as a matter of pride to provide.