Gawd Damnit... too hard
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Thread: Gawd Damnit... too hard

  1. #1
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    Post Gawd Damnit... too hard

    welp... I just cant do it. Im trying to write out a CV (I havent used one in years...) and now I need one, to basically justify my position with the company I currently work for. Im a contractor anyway, so its not a big deal for them to ditch me, but being put on the spot, then producing documentation, it just sh1ts me.

    Im not a real paperwork guru anyway... I get two paragraphs into it, then decide I should re-write the whole thing from the start.. damnit all to hell.

  2. #2
    Registered User Akuma's Avatar
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    What the hell is a CV?

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    Registered User cc_penguin's Avatar
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    [quote]Originally posted by Akuma:
    <strong>What the hell is a CV?</strong><hr></blockquote>

    I dunno, but it must be important if it has to justify his position with the company. Im glad Im not in your postition EC <= That means EvilCabgage Good luck on it

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    Registered User Spaceman Spiff's Avatar
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    Thumbs up

    CV means Crepuscular Vermin. Mice and rats are examples of crepuscular vermin. When you spot any of the little suckers, most companies make you write out a CV report. I guess EvilCabbage hadn't seen any for awhile and couldn't remember how it was done. I just thought I'd let you know...

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    Registered User Akuma's Avatar
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    [quote]Originally posted by Spaceman Spiff:
    <strong>I just thought I'd let you know... </strong><hr></blockquote>

    Thanks for the info Spaceman, my guess was way off!


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    I feel your pain, one place i worked for got bought out by another corp, and every department got "reorganized". Meaning we had to fill out applications to keep our current jobs....

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    In my last job, the only way we could get extra money(we were not paid well) was to fill out a form explaining our job, and then what we planned to accomplish for the year. I was a pc tech, so I wrote down that I would fix broken stuff for the year. Some reason they didn't like that. Said I had to have 5 goals for the year, WHAT freaking goals, I am a tech, I keep things updated and clean, and fix what breaks. Hated the corporate BS so stinking much. Of course, I am still dealing with corporate BS today.

  8. #8
    Registered User techguy13's Avatar
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    [quote]Originally posted by EvilCabbage:
    <strong>welp... I just cant do it. Im trying to write out a CV (I havent used one in years...) and now I need one, to basically justify my position with the company I currently work for. Im a contractor anyway, so its not a big deal for them to ditch me, but being put on the spot, then producing documentation, it just sh1ts me.

    Im not a real paperwork guru anyway... I get two paragraphs into it, then decide I should re-write the whole thing from the start.. damnit all to hell.</strong><hr></blockquote>

    Hey EvilCabbage I recently finished a HR certificate on top of a BA and have helped some friends prepare a resume ,one even got a job and he is a fine arts major, if you want someone to take a look and tweak your CV PM it my way. The following is an outline and procedure for getting a resume started. Finish a ruff draft and go back and clean it up over the next few days. Hope the following helps (forgive the formatting):

    before you ever even start typing your resume, you’ll need a pen and a fresh
    sheet of paper. Taking ten minutes to do the following self-exercise will save
    you agonizing hours in front of the computer wondering, “What IS my
    objective anyway?” This will help you to concisely and powerfully articulate
    your abilities, skills, and goals before you begin actually writing your resume.
    Take a fresh piece of paper and jot the answers to the following:
    1. Consider these areas: education, work, internships/coops, volunteer, extracurricular. Name at least five skills that you have acquired from each category. Now write one-line summaries using active words.
    2. Circle the abilities listed above that you’d like to utilize in your job. Are there
    others that you may have overlooked? Add them to your list. Rank these skills
    in order of most valued to least.
    3. What have been the ten greatest accomplishments in your entire life? What
    personal characteristic enabled you to fulfil your goals? What is your personal
    definition of success?
    4. Have you ever invented, discovered, planned, or organized anything for your
    job or within your community? What was involved in these undertakings exactly?
    The answers to these questions are a great starting point as you begin writing
    your resume. You probably won’t use all of your answers, but this exercise will
    allow you to focus upon the talents that you should emphasize. It will also highlight any valuable assets that don’t fit into standard categorization.
    Now you are ready to write your resume. How best to show that you are
    someone who can get the job done? Carefully choose active, positive words to
    concisely describe yourself. (See the next page for suggestions.)
    In a world of vanillas, you are strawberry swirl.

    How do you concisely and positively show your future employer that you are
    the most qualified applicant for the job? The following words are great to utilize
    in describing your experiences and accomplishments. They can be changed as
    needed. For example: “While a Network support technician at Company X, I
    collaborated with staff from each of the seven departments to develop a new
    system for reporting software error. Upon my implementation of this enhanced
    system, efficiency of repair time was increased by 48%.” Be as specific and,
    when possible, give quantities (dollars saved, sales increased, efficiency improved, etc.)

    50 Irresistible Active Words:
    1. accomplish
    11. conduct
    21. generate
    31. make
    41. propose
    2. achieve
    12. contribute
    22. implement
    32. market
    42. research
    3. adapt
    13. coordinate
    23. improve
    33. monitor
    43. sell
    4. analyze
    14. create
    24. increase
    34. motivate
    44. start
    5. attain
    15. delegate
    25. initiate
    35. negotiate
    45. supervise
    6. balance
    16. design
    26. integrate
    36. obtain
    46. support
    7. calculate
    17. develop
    27. interview
    37. organize
    47. train
    8. collaborate
    18. direct
    28. invent
    38. plan
    48. travel
    9. communicate
    19. enhance
    29. investigate
    39. prepare
    49. work
    10. complete
    20. evaluate
    30. lead
    40. present
    50. write

    All Things Considered
    Probably the most important consideration as your write is your intended
    audience: your future employer. Do some research into the company. What are
    its goals? In what direction has it been moving in the last five years? Are you
    responding to a specific job description? How do your experiences and skills fit
    the description?
    Important information needs to stand out and be easy to find. Your resume
    should be well organized and pleasing to the eye. Top, bottom, left, and right
    margins should be at about 1 inch. Use a standard font, such as Times New
    Roman, Helvetica, or Arial, and use italics, bolding, and underlining sparingly.Remember that your resume may be scanned, copied, faxed, etc. a multiple number of times.
    They sell themselves short.
    Your resume is an advertisement for you. Don’t sell yourself short.
    Make it your prospective employer’s job easy and give them a reason to call
    you in for an interview. Actually, give several! Tailor your resume to the job
    description for the position(s) that you are seeking. Show exactly how your capabilities and accomplishments particularly satisfy the employer’s requirements.
    If you have a qualification that doesn’t fit under any of the usual categories, list
    it anyway—create a category. List computer languages and software
    experience and be as specific as possible. Quantify, quantify, quantify (those
    things that are a direct result of your work. Example: “As an administrator, I was
    responsible for increasing federal grants to my academic institution by 110% in
    a 2-year period.)
    What exactly are the standard parts of the resume mentioned earlier?
    Component by component they are:
    Personal Information
    While these two words may bring all kinds sordid tidbits to mind, all they really
    refer to in the context of your resume are your name and address. At the top
    center of the page, write your name (no title), address, phone number and e-mail
    or fax if you have those.
    You need not include: social security number, marital status, age, race, religion,
    health, citizenship, a second mailing address, or parts of your name that you never use (for example a middle name.)
    Profile
    This is also known as a “summary.” Some resume-writing guides will refer to
    this statement as your “objective;” however, a profile statement is much more
    impressive. An “objective” describes what you are looking for in a job or what
    you want the job to do for you, whereas the “profile” details what you have to
    offer your prospective employer, what you can do for him/her. This section is a
    concise and succinct list of your skills, in order of most to least relevant. Refer
    back to your self-assessment and the list of action words and try to match your
    skills with the specific job requirements. Remember that this is the first thing
    that the hiring official will read and that those first 30 seconds are crucial. Don’t
    hesitate to “sell yourself” by highlighting all of your strengths.
    Education/Honors
    List the name of the institutions, degrees, dates awarded and honors and
    awards (GPA higher than a 3.5 is appropriate to include.) Begin with the most
    recent and work your way back. Emphasize items like collaborative or group-related experience, communication skills, and the ability to work according to a deadline.
    Work Experience
    There are two ways to list this information:
    Functional: Arrange experience by skill to highlight your abilities. Sample
    headings: leadership, computer skills, publications, etc. This style focuses on
    results and achievements.
    Chronological: The most common format for resumes. Start with your most recent position and work your way back. Remember your ABCs:
    1.Achievements—Tangible end-results. Quantify these whenever possible by citing figures like monetary funds saved, efficiency improved, sales increased, etc. that show a direct result from your work.
    2.Benefits—How does your job experience make you uniquely qualified for this position? How will you satisfy this prospective employer’s needs?
    3.Capabilities—What and how will you deliver? A sample resume featuring each kind of format is available at the end of this tutorial.
    Related Activities/Additional Information
    Use this final section to highlight any related academic, professional or
    community organizations in which you hold office or additional information.
    Describe in detail leadership roles. Computer software, languages or knowledge
    may be listed here (or even given their own separate heading if applicable.) In
    some cases you may wish to indicate willingness to travel or relocate. The key
    to this section is that items be relevant to the position you are seeking.
    Otherwise, do not include them.

    Do...
    Have a trusted friend (or two or three) proofread.
    Use active verbs to describe your experience and skills.
    List items from most important to least.
    Be concise. Eliminate things that are not relevant.
    Laser print on plain white paper.
    Try, whenever possible, to tailor to a job description

    Don’t...
    Sell yourself short.
    Bother stating “references available upon request.” That is assumed. Have a separate sheet available with that information to give if it is requested.
    Use underlining, bolding, italics excessively.

    Content:
    Name is at top and highlighted by bolding or larger size type; address and phone number information are correct and complete. Each entry demonstrates a skill or accomplishment. These are consistent with the job requirements. Descriptions use active verbs and verb tense is consistent (can use past tense for everything to avoid confusion, even present job.) Repetition is minimal.
    There are no spelling mistakes or typos.
    Has been proofread by yourself and at least one other person.

    Organization:
    Hold the paper at arm’s length. Is the page too busy? Is there too much “white space” anywhere? Are there areas that are too crowded? Is information easy to find?
    Best assets are listed first.
    Dates of employment are easy to find and the format is consistent.

    Format:
    It looks like a published document and is visually pleasing.
    It can be easily scanned. · There is no blurring, marks, or faint letters. Fonts are conservative; bolding, underlining and other effects are kept at a minimum.
    Congratulations! You are now ready to submit your resume. You will need to
    send it with a cover letter tailored to the specific job for which you are
    applying.
    No need to be concerned. The voices in my head assure me I am completely sane.

    "Dammit Jim I’m a Star Ship surgeon not the free clinic."

  9. #9
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    I have a headache now.

  10. #10
    Most Greaterlyist King Grover's Avatar
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    damn dewd that was a lot of werdz

  11. #11
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    [quote]Originally posted by EvilCabbage:
    <strong>welp... I just cant do it. Im trying to write out a CV (I havent used one in years...) and now I need one, to basically justify my position with the company I currently work for. Im a contractor anyway, so its not a big deal for them to ditch me, but being put on the spot, then producing documentation, it just sh1ts me.

    Im not a real paperwork guru anyway... I get two paragraphs into it, then decide I should re-write the whole thing from the start.. damnit all to hell.</strong><hr></blockquote>

    I feel ya, man. I absolutely HATE redoing a CV. And to think, I used to do it for other people as a side job. That and letters of application and the like. Not that there's anything I could do to make it more fun, but if you want input or help, I'd be happy to oblige. PM or email me if so...

    [quote]Originally posted by Akuma:
    <strong>What the hell is a CV?</strong><hr></blockquote>

    Oh, yeah...curriculum vitae. Another word for résumé.

  12. #12
    Registered User Spaceman Spiff's Avatar
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    Thumbs down

    [quote]Originally posted by Renée:
    <strong>

    Oh, yeah...curriculum vitae. Another word for résumé.</strong><hr></blockquote>

    Doggonit, Renée, you ruined my inventive response...

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    And it was definitely inventive! That much more fun to ruin...

  14. #14
    Registered User Spaceman Spiff's Avatar
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    Exclamation

    But I spent a couple of minutes thinking that one up. Did you like how I used the word "crepuscular"? Crepuscular is a cool word. It doesn't mean what it sounds like...

  15. #15
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    [quote]Originally posted by Spaceman Spiff:
    <strong>But I spent a couple of minutes thinking that one up. Did you like how I used the word "crepuscular"? Crepuscular is a cool word. It doesn't mean what it sounds like... </strong><hr></blockquote>

    Heh, heh, certainly not but I write poetry and 'crepuscular' just doesn't flow like 'gloaming'....

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