You Da Man? another simple test

[Wyckyd1]

You Da Man? Yet another test got in email today.


1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:
A. Lovemaking
B. Screwing
C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town.

2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've
both shared:
A. Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship.
B. Your blood-test results.
C. Five tequila slammers.


3. You time your orgasm so that:
A. Your partner climaxes first.
B. You both climax simultaneously.
C. You don't miss ESPN Sportscenter.


4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
A. Healthy, creative love-play.
B. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would agree to.
C. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend need to ever find out
about.


5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is:
A. The best part of the experience.
B. The second best part of the experience.
C. $100 extra.


6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month.
You tell her that it is:
A. Of no importance to your affectionate feelings for her.
B. Not a problem, she can join your gym.
C. A conservative estimate.


7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:
A. A myth
B. An oxymoron
C. A moron


8. Foreplay is to sex as:
A. Appetizer is to entree.
B. Primer is to paint.
C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.


9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
A. "I hope we can still be friends."
B. "I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep."
C. "Welcome to Dumpsville, population, YOU.


10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy.
B. Is uptight and a waste of time.
C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.


Evaluating Results:


If you answered "A" more than 7 times, check your pants to make sure you really are a man.


If you answered "B" more than 7 times, check into therapy, you're a
little confused.

If you answered "C" more than 7 times, "YOU DA MAN!"

[Lycia]

Change that to "You Da LONELY Man"

[Hippie_Tech_Too]

Ironically, most of the friends I would classify as "Da Man" always seem to get the women. Go figure.
Apparently there are a lot of women out there that think being bold, crass, and rude is a sign of confidence. I hate being the shy and polite guy. It gets me nowhere.

[TrackMan]

[quote]Originally posted by Hippie_Tech_Too:
<strong>Ironically, most of the friends I would classify as "Da Man" always seem to get the women. Go figure.
Apparently there are a lot of women out there that think being bold, crass, and rude is a sign of confidence. I hate being the shy and polite guy. It gets me nowhere. </strong><hr></blockquote>

Man, I'm feelin' that...
The funny thing is that the women I talk to as friends say that I'm nice/sensitive and women like that; but nooo, nice guys finish last.

[EvilCabbage]

[quote]Originally posted by TrackMan:
<strong>

Man, I'm feelin' that...
The funny thing is that the women I talk to as friends say that I'm nice/sensitive and women like that; but nooo, nice guys finish last.</strong><hr></blockquote>

I hear that.

[Sowulo]

[quote]Originally posted by Hippie_Tech_Too:
<strong>Ironically, most of the friends I would classify as "Da Man" always seem to get the women. Go figure.
Apparently there are a lot of women out there that think being bold, crass, and rude is a sign of confidence. I hate being the shy and polite guy. It gets me nowhere. </strong><hr></blockquote>

<h1>NO SH!T!!!</h1>

[Papa Smurf]

I dont need any test. I am DA MAN