Dear Abby...
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Thread: Dear Abby...

  1. #1
    Registered User Major Kong's Avatar
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    Talking Dear Abby...

    I am a crack dealer in Beaumont, Texas who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus. My parents live in Fort Worth and one of my sisters, who lives in Pflugerville, is married to a transvestite. My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Dallas. I have two brothers, one is currently serving a non-parole life sentence at Huntsville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his three children. I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in Longview. She is a part time "working girl".

    All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fiancee and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest with her.

    Should I tell her about my cousin who supports John Kerry* for President?

    Signed,
    Worried About My Reputation

    *Insert candidate here
    I only post using 100% recycled electrons!!!

    Stay on the bomb run, boys. I'm going to get them doors open if it hair lips everybody on Bear Creek.

  2. #2
    Registered User Stalemate's Avatar
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    He he.

  3. #3
    Banned Ya_know's Avatar
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    That was kind of dumb...

  4. #4
    Registered User techs's Avatar
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    I admit I laughed.

  5. #5
    Registered User GrandDad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Major Kong
    I am a crack dealer in Beaumont, Texas who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus. My parents live in Fort Worth and one of my sisters, who lives in Pflugerville, is married to a transvestite. My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Dallas. I have two brothers, one is currently serving a non-parole life sentence at Huntsville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his three children. I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in Longview. She is a part time "working girl".

    All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fiancee and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest with her.

    Should I tell her about my cousin who supports John Kerry* for President?

    Signed,
    Worried About My Reputation

    *Insert candidate here
    Dear ; Worried About My Reputation

    Don't worry about your cousin for now .

    If you really love this 'girl' and she love's you blindly

    then do her a really big favor and
























    kill her now and put out of her present and future

    misery ,

    and then go

    kill your family

    and then yourself and

    end our misery .

    Good Luck

    and Thank you

    if you succeed

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