The Customer is Always WRONG!

[theBeast]

I just love to prove a teste customer wrong! Especially when they tell you how to run a business.
I had one person in who was ranting that we shouldn't be charging tax on our labour charges. She went on b!+ching about how at her business (a fuel company) they CAN'T charge tax on their labour when they deliver oil to customers, and she was the "tax lady", blah, blah, blah.
I said, "Well, I'll talk with the boss, and we'll check it out. We'll call you back when we find out more on it."

So, I popped over to the Ministry of Finance's web page and came across a fax-back service for retail sales tax. Among the directory were two documents. One titled, "Labour Charges" and another titled, "Delivery Charges". So, I requested both documents.
VERY FIRST LINE said, "If you provide a service of installation, dismantling, repairing, or maintaining equipment you are providing a taxable service."
Then it listed examples, and "Installing, maintaining, repairing, or dismantling computers" was among the list of taxable services.
The info for delivery charges stated that if the product was taxable, then delivery was taxable. However, since most of their customers are farmers, they are all tax exempt, so they are free from the tax on their delivery charge.
It was such a thrill to see that! From the government taboot! It was a pleasure to be there when the boss called and told her the news. LOL!
I'm not normally this mean...except when customers continually pi$$ me off like this one.
She was freaking because there was a "virus" on her computer that was making her "screen jump." I did find a virus, but it was the happy99.exe. I've NEVER known it to do that. Also, the screen never ONCE "jumped" for me.
After cleaning the system up, she called back a few weeks later saying that her screen was "jumping" again. She wanted Win 98 and a CD-RW installed, so we did no problems. Again, the screen didn't "jump for me. This time, I suspected possibly the monitor.
She called up a few days later (just today), with the same "problem." I told her I was 100% certain it was the monitor causing it, since it never ONCE happened her. She doubted that it was the monitor because, "It worked on her daughter's". Hmm...mayhaps her daughter is running at a different refresh rate?! I told her to bring the whole shootin' match in (CPU and monitor), and I would hook it up with her here. I had another monitor on standby incase her monitor went flippy.
So, I plugged 'er in, powered 'er on. Windows came up PERFECT. I dicked around with refresh rates, resolutions, palett sizes, whatever. None ONCE did it flip for me.
"WHAT HAPPENED?!" she exclaimed quite excitedly.
"I did NOTHING."

This woman also came in last week, looking for her computer (which she dropped off a day earlier, and I told her it would be about 3 days before it was done). When I told her it wasn't done, she playfully kicked and punched me. Now, I don't care if she was just joking around. CUSTOMERS DO NOT TOUCH ME! Last I checked, "Body Rub Parlour" wasn't in our store name!

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***the Beast
- I only came for the platypus soup

[MacGyver]

You should definitely charge her with assault! Then we'll see who's joking around! Man, Beast, you put up with a lot of B.S. but physical violence should never be tolerated. The cops are paid to deal with that B.S., you don't!

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All this technology, and I still can't download a pizza!

[theBeast]

It's just stuff that's being added to the list. I had a customer a while ago call me a "dummy" because I didn't call him back right away with pricing on upgrading his computer.
He also got pi$$ed because I left 15 minutes early, even though his computer was finished and waiting to be picked up.
"MORON, WHAT DO YOU NEED ME TO TELL YOU?! I ADDED RAM, I UPGRADED THE HARD DRIVE, DUMMY! NOW GET OUT OF MY STORE!"

This is just hush-hush right now...
I've got my sights on another job. I've applied to be phone support for an ISP. I know you don't think it's a good idea (you mentioned that to Cobra), but it's a foot in the door for a VERY large business. Once they see the skills, they're sure to transfer me to another department. They don't just do ISP support. They're a large and constantly growing call centre.
I did a preliminary phone interview a few weeks ago. One question they asked was what made me stand out above the other candidates? I kicked myself when I realized I could have gone on for an hour about not only my 5 years of computer repair, and end-user tech support, but also 2 years of call centre experience working for a now defunct long-distance company, working as a front-line billing clerk calling for address verification. You want irate...try telling a customer that they owe over $600 in long distance charges! Also, I spent 6 months (my first 6 months as a real-live techie) as a user support tech for the same company. That job was pretty much dropped in my lap. The previous tech left for another job, and the VP of human resources came up to me and say, "You know computers don't you?"
"Well, sorta..." (I just graduated college for systems analysis and design, no real hands-on experience).
"How would you like to be the user support tech for our office here?"
"Duh-okay!"

Later, after the business had been bought by Sprint, the VP of IS came up to me and said, "How'd you like to work for us? We're willing to offer $50,000 a year. But you have to move to London."
Dummy me turned 'em down. I didn't want to move to London at that time. Sigh... So, I took a minimum wage job as a slave tech at a junky computer store, where I worked for 2 years before coming here (London).

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***the Beast
- I only came for the platypus soup

[MacGyver]

I hope that it turns into something else real quick. Do yourself a favour and listen to these tech call recordings. Also keep in mind that Sympatico and Rogers (the two big Ontario ISP's) have the worst tech support and there are plenty of frustrated people in this province.

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All this technology, and I still can't download a pizza!

[theBeast]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by MacGyver:
I hope that it turns into something else real quick. Do yourself a favour and listen to these tech call recordings. Also keep in mind that Sympatico and Rogers (the two big Ontario ISP's) have the worst tech support and there are plenty of frustrated people in this province.

</font>

Hmm...I wonder if I'm on any of those! LOL! I had a REALLY hard time with Rogers Tech support. I had Rogers cable (stress HAD) about a year ago, and I haven't had any worse problems than when I was with them. First, I had connections constantly dropping out. When I ran a "ping" I kept getting "Hardware error." I said, "Now, I may be wrong, but I think that it means theres something wrong with the HARDWARE."
They had me change from dynamic IP to static IP, then from static to dynamic, and back and forth. Every time I restarted the computer, it would work fine for about an hour, then die.
It was a full install, so I didn't want to screw around with any of the hardware they put in...it was THEIR responsibility.
I did a clean install of Win 98, blah, blah, blah. No go. I tried different CAT5 cables, tried different coax cables. Still the same problem.
I told them all this, and still I struggled with "please try removing your TCP/IP protocol, and reinstall it."
"Gee...my computer works... BUT IT WILL STOP WORKING IN AN HOUR!"
"Well, if it's working, we can't do anything..."
So, again, I struggled.
Eventually I said, "Listen, the network card is bad (this after I had the modem changed, the cable-in-box tested, blah, blah, blah)." The tech told me that he believed me, but he would have to pass it by a supervisor before he could send a tech out to change the NIC.
So, the weiner-supervisor gets on the phone and said, "I don't believe you. I've never heard of intermittent problems. It will either work or not work. There is NO way it will work one minute and not the next. If it's NOT the network card, we WILL charge you the $200 for a service call."
Man, I went ape-sh!t on him. I said, "Well, obviously you haven't worked with computers that long if you haven't heard of an intermittent problem." I also related to him that it WAS NOT working from day 1, and it was THEIR responsibility to ENSURE it was working from the moment the tech left my place. This was NOT done, so whatever it was...Windows problem, driver problem, cable problem, network card problem, THEY had to solve it since I PAID to have a full, and proper installation.
So, I eventually got a network tech out. He popped in a new NIC, and schwing! I was hopping on the net no prob. He tried it out for a while, and there were no sags.
I cancelled the service cuz I went with LookTV. I was forced by the super to go back with Rogers Cable (apparently 2 3" screws can bring down a 12 floor building ), so I decided to go back on cable internet (stupid...stupid...stupid). First thing I told 'em was, "I am doing a self install. I don't want any of your MORONS touching my system again!" I got sags, and connection losses again. Fearing another bad NIC, I grabbed a new one from work, which I KNEW worked (benefits of working as a retail tech). Same problem. So, I tried a fresh install of 98. Same problem. So, I decided to call 'em to see if there were any blackouts in the area.
"Which browser are you using?"
"IE 5.0"
"We don't support IE 5.0. [click]"
GRRRRRRRRRRRR!
So, I call back.
"Which browser are you using?"
"IE 4.0"
"Ok, sir, there is currently a problem with our Kingston server. We expect the problem to be solved in 24 hours."
(Apparently, if you're running IE 5.0 you don't have priviledge to that information).
So, 24 hours go by. Still no connecty. I decide to try again in the morn, giving them 32 hours to solve the problem (I respect field techs, I know the potentials of nightmares). Still no connecty.
So, I call 'em back up. This time it was a problem with their mail server, or something retarted. Give 'em ANOTHER 24 hours.
So, another day later. No connection. There's some OTHER problem. After 2 weeks, I had no good clean connection to the net. I told 'em I wanted to cancel my service.
"Sure, no prob. We'll send a tech out to pick up the modem." (Since they sent one to drop off the modem).
Two weeks go by. No tech came to pick up the modem yet... So, I decide to call 'em. I had cooled off a bit by then, and asked what it would take to get me back on the net. "$80 set up fee."
"WTF?! My cancellation request hadn't been processed yet, and I still have the equipment."
"Oh, and I see that there is a $700 charge on your account for failing to return the modem."
"WTF?! YOU F&*%ING MORON! YOUR F&^*ING MORONIC TECHS WERE SUPPOSED TO COME THE F&%* OUT HERE TO PICK UP THE F&%*ING MODEM!" (Yes, I did use those explicits...you TRY to be nice)
So, I storm down there, and chew the clerk's head off a bit, calling him an idiot working for an idiot company.
Mr. Rogers and I aren't the best buds...

I've had problems with the PPV also. I was offered 3 months free digital TV service. Sure, no prob!
So, my wife and I are watching the tube, and decide that we want to try out the PPV. We had look before, and PPV was as simple as choosing the movie you want, push the "PPV" button, and it would dial-up and download the encryption for the movie.
Hmm...the Roger's tuner doesn't have that option. The channel we wanted the movie on had "To order this movie call 1-800-blah-blah-blah".
So, I call. It was 8:50pm, and the movie started at 9:00pm. I navigate my way through their maze of a phone system, FINALLY reaching, "To order pay-per-view movies, press 1".
So, I punch 1.
"Thank you. All our operators are currently busy. Please hold..."
Blood pressure rising... It's starting to take WAY to long to get a movie.
FINALLY a CSR (customer service rep) answers. I give her my phone number, and which movie I want.
"Thank you. That will be on Channel 310 at 9:00." (8:59)
So, I settle in with my wife to watch the movie.
Hmm...it's not starting...9:10pm rolls around, still no show. Grr...
So, I call 'em up. Navigate away. 9:20pm rolls around, I FINALLY get to talk to someone. I told 'em my perdicament, and they said, "Ok, we'll cancel that order, and set you up for the 9:45 showing."
Great, 25 minutes SHOULD be enough time to get the order squared around.
10:00pm. I navigate through the IVR (integrated voice response) maze AGAIN. I'm a little grumpy at this point.
I FINALLY get to talk to a CSR again. I told her that I wasn't impressed with the way PPV was working, and I maid the off-hand remark, "Geeze, you'd think a multi-billion dollar corporation would figure out something as simple as PPV!"
"I just work for the company, sir."
Suddenly, I could FEEL my blood pressure rise through the roof. NEVER EVER EVER say to me, "I'm just doing my job." IMHO, that is the WORST excuse in the world to give someone. So, I tore her a new a$$ and said, "Let me speak to your supervisor, twit!"
I was put on hold for 5 minutes. Then, she came back and said, "Sorry, there isn't a supervisor available."
I tore her another a$$, and told her, "You better HOPE that I don't get ANY charges for these movies on my bill!"
She tried to reassure me that they wouldn't, and I told her that I had VERY little faith in the company she worked for. I slammed the phone down, and went to bed.
MAN! If I could just sit down with Rogers and say to him, "Man, what kind of Mickey Mouse operation are you running? Don't ANY of your employees have kindergarten diplomas yet?"

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***the Beast
- I only came for the platypus soup

[MacGyver]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by theBeast:
"WTF?! YOU F&*%ING MORON! YOUR F&^*ING MORONIC TECHS WERE SUPPOSED TO COME THE F&%* OUT HERE TO PICK UP THE F&%*ING MODEM!" (Yes, I did use those explicits...you TRY to be nice)
So, I storm down there, and chew the clerk's head off a bit, calling him an idiot working for an idiot company.
Mr. Rogers and I aren't the best buds...
</font>

OK, imagine you are on phone call centre tech support and YOU get the call from yourself. Would you want to deal with you?
Ya it sounds wierd but think about it.

There are loads of good jobs out there, don't settle for something crappy you won't be happy with. check out www.workopolis.com , www.monster.ca , to name a few. I see plenty of ads in the careers section of the Toronto star. Some jobs have six digit STARTING salaries with benefits. Of course you have to be qualified to get that but you catch my drift.

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All this technology, and I still can't download a pizza!

[This message has been edited by MacGyver (edited March 13, 2001).]

[cyberhh]

Nothing better than working years in the field and having some id10t who descided that he could screw up a network like nobody's business watch over your shoulder and talk about how he would have done it except "fill in the blank" then watch him type a web address in the search window of msn on his AOL browser!!!

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Death is lighter than a feather - duty heavier than a mountian.

[CREEPINGDEATH]

woah Beast imformation overload !


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" I ATE A BABY !! " -Fat Bastard.

[theBeast]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by CREEPINGDEATH:
woah Beast imformation overload !


</font>

I'm a writer at heart, can't ya tell? LOL!
I'm also a very angry person.
Nah, MacGyver, this is just a launching point. Like I said, the company does much more than just ISP. They're in a constant state of growth, so it does open a lot of opportunities for me.
Plus, I will be working and living in the same town, if I get the job, so it'll be MUCH easier for me to track down new jobs.
Like a wise person once told me, "Sometimes you have to take a step back to take a step forward."
I can handle irate customers over the phone pretty well. I just can't stand people who are in-your-face and hovering, watching every move I make, and saying, "How'd you do that?" after I do a patented(tm) move to remove something from their registery.
Also, it's a three-level tech support. Level 1 is the base level, where all initial problems go. If you're unable to solve a problem, you pass it to level 2, then to level 3. Level 1 will see it's largest share of grumpy customers. Until you tell them, "Sir, did you restart your computer?" "Ma'am, was there a lightning storm? Your modem may be fried."
These are filled with the weinie tech-support guys.
The test I took, I actually had to laugh at it. We were given 1/2 hour to answer 25 questions regarding Windows 9x and Internet stuff.
There were questions like, "If you delete a file in Windows 95, can you recover it?"
"How do you manually dial an internet connection?"
You needed 15/25 in order to pass.
I finished the test in less than 10 minutes. I got 25/25.
If 15 is their base qualification for a level 1 tech support, I suspect I won't be on level 1 for long before being bumped up.
I'm also going to go after my Network +, TCP/IP, and MCSE certificates while I'm there.

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***the Beast
- I only came for the platypus soup

[Imagenatas]

Whoa that was a huge rant above.

Downright rant-o-rama!

Reading all that stressed me out.

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Hey? Why is my computer promting me if I would like to accept a cookie? Is it Oatmeal or Chocolate Chip?

[theBeast]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Imagenatas:
Whoa that was a huge rant above.

Downright rant-o-rama!

Reading all that stressed me out.

</font>

LOL! Like I said: I'm a writer, and an angry person!

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***the Beast
- I only came for the platypus soup

[Kyr0n]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by theBeast:
It's just stuff that's being added to the list. I had a customer a while ago call me a "dummy" because I didn't call him back right away with pricing on upgrading his computer.
He also got pi$$ed because I left 15 minutes early, even though his computer was finished and waiting to be picked up.
"MORON, WHAT DO YOU NEED ME TO TELL YOU?! I ADDED RAM, I UPGRADED THE HARD DRIVE, DUMMY! NOW GET OUT OF MY STORE!"

This is just hush-hush right now...
I've got my sights on another job. I've applied to be phone support for an ISP. I know you don't think it's a good idea (you mentioned that to Cobra), but it's a foot in the door for a VERY large business. Once they see the skills, they're sure to transfer me to another department. They don't just do ISP support. They're a large and constantly growing call centre.
I did a preliminary phone interview a few weeks ago. One question they asked was what made me stand out above the other candidates? I kicked myself when I realized I could have gone on for an hour about not only my 5 years of computer repair, and end-user tech support, but also 2 years of call centre experience working for a now defunct long-distance company, working as a front-line billing clerk calling for address verification. You want irate...try telling a customer that they owe over $600 in long distance charges! Also, I spent 6 months (my first 6 months as a real-live techie) as a user support tech for the same company. That job was pretty much dropped in my lap. The previous tech left for another job, and the VP of human resources came up to me and say, "You know computers don't you?"
"Well, sorta..." (I just graduated college for systems analysis and design, no real hands-on experience).
"How would you like to be the user support tech for our office here?"
"Duh-okay!"

Later, after the business had been bought by Sprint, the VP of IS came up to me and said, "How'd you like to work for us? We're willing to offer $50,000 a year. But you have to move to London."
Dummy me turned 'em down. I didn't want to move to London at that time. Sigh... So, I took a minimum wage job as a slave tech at a junky computer store, where I worked for 2 years before coming here (London).

</font>

*Cringe* Phone support...eeeeeeeuggghhh

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If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then lets get wasted and have the time of our lives.

[Skatman]

DONT let them fool you beast!!

Catches like "tons of growth" or "career opportunities" mean "suck you in with the hopes of getting somewhere but you wont cause we dont like you"


i fell for that one before and will never do it again

Maybe i am just a bit bitter after being there 3 years and getting promoted then the company goes out of business.