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February 15th, 2001, 03:34 PM
#46
Umm, I love the people that call and say "how do I burn songs I got from napster onto a cd to work in my car." I love telling them that is illegal for me to tell them and that I could lose my license for promoting that. Also that the mounties have been monitoring this area alot lately and to be very careful...... click
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Sit on that chair and think about what you've done to your poor computer!!!!
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February 15th, 2001, 03:38 PM
#47
Ive gotta try "Floppy, Floppy, Floppy" on my students... they wont forget about leaving the disk in after doing that in front of the rest of the class...
I used to do tech support for pc hardware (a modem install in this case) and I had a call that still cracks me up to this day.
This was about 3 yrs ago when WebTV units were poping up in every department store/ Wal Mart- Got a call from a guy who was having trouble installing his modem....
Not realizing the difference between a modem for a PC and what a WebTV unit did, he had mistakenly bought a PC modem that the (unnamed) company I worked for sold and was unsuccessfully trying to install it into his TV set to "Get on that WebTV..." He had the TV apart and was trying to find where to plug the modem in! Even after explaining the difference between the two to him, Im not convinced he believed me, after all, he had seen them get on the Internet with the TV at WalMart!
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Live long, die rich, leave a 20yo widow...
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February 15th, 2001, 03:41 PM
#48
Got a call today from a girl in our sales department...
Caller: I had an Excel spreadsheet that opened directly from my email attatchment that I was working on...
Me: Ok...
Caller: Well, I closed it.
Me: Well, since you had been working on it did it ask you to save it?
Caller: No.
Me: Well, it didn't prompt you at all? Didn't ask anything? Are you sure?
Caller: Oh yeah, there was a prompt window...
Me: What did it say?
Caller: Closing Outlook you will lose any unsaved changes to your files, or something.
Me: Ok, what did you do then?
Caller: I went ahead and closed Outlook...can you just get my file back?
Me: I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you...can you repeat that? (I honestly, didn't hear her...)
Caller: Well, can you...OHHHH!..S***!!! Nevermind  [click]
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"then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel, is just a freight train coming your way..."
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February 15th, 2001, 04:02 PM
#49
The best one I ever had was when I was doing NT phone support for a software company.
Customer call me and asks if I could dial into their system to check out their database because they had a power failure.
No, the power wasnt back on yet!!!!!!
Also, Same company, On the phone with a customer and asked her to click the start button to get to programs. Well she starts freaking out that everything went black and what did I do.
She "clicked"the monitor power button off.
They are all I.B.K.B!!!!
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February 15th, 2001, 04:08 PM
#50
I just saw u8drtsox's post. Where the heck do you work and how do I get a job there? I'd love to be working in a place with remote access to the users PC's and have a place that has the dough to have a full staff that helps the users and allows you to go on sight and they pay their people a decent wage. If I had all of that I'd probably be able to suck it up better and have a better time on the phone with the users. I bet the give PC education classes where you work too. So how do I get an application to the place you work at?
I'd like to note that I've never had a screaming match with a user ever, but when working other jobs where retail is a part of the equation you find a whole new level of idiot with no constraints on their behavior. At work I answer calls from other members of the company and if they become irate I can report them and the same applies to me. In the world of retail the customer more than often will get upset and begin screaming over a $1.98 item because they think they can bully you into free tech support or free products and you would be shocked how many places that just give people what they want. I do it myself sometimes just 'cause I don't want to hear a raft of sh*t. People will and more than often do take advantage in the retail world and they make the job 10 times harder than it is. The most infuriating thing is that they will not buy a book and blame you for every woe they ever have and drive you crazy in the process sometimes.
There are some users that do make your day. The odd person that can follow one simple instruction or just smile at you or converse on an intelligent basis that makes your day. Those are the ones you live for.
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now type format c: and press enter and you will never have a pc problem ever again...
[This message has been edited by ilovetheusers (edited February 15, 2001).]
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February 15th, 2001, 04:26 PM
#51
About 2 years ago I was working for a mail order PC company. A customer had totally screwed their system (it was mainly his wife's) and we had to do a re-install. He didn't want to ship it back so I walked him through the process and had him read every message starting with the format warning "all data on drive will be lost. Do you wish to continue Y/N?"
After the install, he asked why the screen looked like when they first bought it and where all their stuff was.
Reminded him of the message that he read aloud twice and that all calls were recorded for training perposes on both ends. If he would like a copy, send $10 US to (insert company address). He later e-mailed to ATTN: Tech Manager and my supervisor pulled the tape and told me to keep up the good work...
The moral here is you should never bully someone who is genuinely trying to help you out of a jam.
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If you make a smarter computer, the user will find a subtler hammer.
Stress.... The uncontrollable urge to choke the living $417 out of someone who desperately needs it.
Ignorance.... The inherent capacity to demand of someone else that which one is too lazy to learn/perform for one's self.
User....An individual who, through immense proportions of ignorance, create stress.
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February 15th, 2001, 04:33 PM
#52
Another one of those "I know what I'm doing" idiots called today. He's been in the office before, and he irks me every time he's here. ("Uh, yeah, I'm having a problem with my 3-Common network card".
Anyway, he calls today. His computer isn't booting all the way up. I finally get him to tell me that he's tried to install more memory...
Me: Are you using SIMM or DIMM chips?
Him: Ummm... the 72 pin ones.
Me: Okay, did you make sure to match the parity and clock speed?
Him: Huh?
Me: What type of chip did you install?
Him: A 72 pin 32 MB.
Me: Okay. What's the clock speed?
Him: Well, the machine is a P 166.
Me (staying calm): Ummm... do you still have the book that came with your motherboard or PC?
Him: No a friend put it together for me.
Me: Your "friend" didn't leave you the book or any specs?
Him: No. So, the machine is a P 166...
It went on like that for a while until I assured him that, if he brought the machine in, I could look up the motherboard and get the correct memory for him. Lucky for me, he wants a CD-RW, too.
"Does that run off the motherboard?" - Argh... "No, it runs all by itself from my shop, still in the box." Idiot.
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"In a 32-bit world, you're a 2-bit loser..."
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February 15th, 2001, 04:46 PM
#53
Not Quite Phone Support....
Guy in windrivers chatroom - can you get me a driver for my epson stylus ex printer?
Me - Probably, what win version
Guy - ME - and don't send me to Epson, I rang them and they said they weren't going to write an ME driver for that printer.
You had to be there....
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February 15th, 2001, 05:30 PM
#54
www.caliber.com forward me a resume and i'll pass it along...we do support for canters all over the world and we can hit EVERY ws,router,server...you name it..remotely. AND we have the auth to tell the facilitator to box it up and ship it out...bang pop in a replacement and off you go...its a beautiful thing....
only one drawback...you guessed it...the facilitator...these part-timers are hired to smile and shake hands, NOT troubleshoot. you would figure that with writin FAQs in the notes DB and a limited # of possibilities, that these people could remember how to put a floppy in the workstation and reboot...i have the same group of about 40 people out in the field and i swear that 80% of my calls are problems that i walked them through a week ago, or something that i have consistantly refered them to the FAQs on.
the company rocks though...all the amenities and OT to boot!!
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by ilovetheusers:
I just saw u8drtsox's post. Where the heck do you work and how do I get a job there? I'd love to be working in a place with remote access to the users PC's and have a place that has the dough to have a full staff that helps the users and allows you to go on sight and they pay their people a decent wage. If I had all of that I'd probably be able to suck it up better and have a better time on the phone with the users. I bet the give PC education classes where you work too. So how do I get an application to the place you work at?
I'd like to note that I've never had a screaming match with a user ever, but when working other jobs where retail is a part of the equation you find a whole new level of idiot with no constraints on their behavior. At work I answer calls from other members of the company and if they become irate I can report them and the same applies to me. In the world of retail the customer more than often will get upset and begin screaming over a $1.98 item because they think they can bully you into free tech support or free products and you would be shocked how many places that just give people what they want. I do it myself sometimes just 'cause I don't want to hear a raft of sh*t. People will and more than often do take advantage in the retail world and they make the job 10 times harder than it is. The most infuriating thing is that they will not buy a book and blame you for every woe they ever have and drive you crazy in the process sometimes.
There are some users that do make your day. The odd person that can follow one simple instruction or just smile at you or converse on an intelligent basis that makes your day. Those are the ones you live for.
</font>
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"Don't hate the media....BECOME the media!!" Jello Biafra - Dead Kennedys
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February 15th, 2001, 06:37 PM
#55
...just when you start to have hope for humanity, people like these show up to reinforce the disappointment. This is why I only support and build systems for people that have, at minimum, basic computer knowledge (reading and matching skills, and can describe things, i.e., the thingie with two buttons and the long cord, etc...).
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I can show you the door, but it is up to you to walk through
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February 15th, 2001, 06:47 PM
#56
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February 16th, 2001, 11:39 AM
#57
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Resqu:
Them: Uhhh, Yea, there is a disk in it!
Me: Push the button, and pull the disk out.
Them: Ok
Me: Now this is the important part, Hold the floppy disk as high over your head as you can and yell in a very loud voice "floppy, floppy, floppy" three times while turning on the pc
Them: Are your sure?
Me: Trust me!
What happens next just proves more and more people really dont need a pc at home!!!
</font>
Now I know why Rats eat their young. I must have skipped over this one man. Funny Funny Funny. I get my friends like this all the time. One guy I know always has his wife call me because he knows I don't like talking to him but her on the other hand makes sure she does something wrong to the system to get me there conviently when he isn't around Hubba Hubba OOOOOOHHHHH YEAH!!!!! No charge for fixing their PC
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If you think I'm standig here as the world goes by. You're thinking like a fool 'cause it's a case of do or die. Out there is a fortune waiting to be had, if you think i'll let it go your mad You've Got Another Thing Coming
If you think I'm standig here as the world goes by. You're thinking like a fool 'cause it's a case of do or die. Out there is a fortune waiting to be had, if you think i'll let it go your mad You've Got Another Thing Coming
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