Excuse me, ma'am, but the computer does not like juice.

[theBeast]

Ok, here's the short version of the story. Sold a computer to a woman who was a bit freaky. She gave me the creeps from the minute she walked in. Big thing that stuck out in the coversation was the fact that she was menopausal. "Hmm...I don't remember seeing MD, PhD at the end of my name..." Anywho...against my better judgement, she bought a system from us, and wanted us to install it for 'em.
Sure, not a problem, even though it is just plug green into green, purple into purple, and blue into blue. But, we're nice guys, so we take the 1/2 hour drive to deliver the system.
She was freaky when I went out there. Native American music blasting in the background, the heavy scent of incense hanging in the air, the tomtom drum in her hand all made me feel a tad uneasy about this delivery.
She talked nonstop about stuff...nothing in particular...one of those people who has to ask and answer their own questions. "What is that? Oh, it's the mouse. Where does that go? Oh, in the purple plug. Have you set up the Internet? How do you get in the internet? Oh, it's the same as my old computer. What's Windows ME? Oh, it looks like Windows 95. Does it run like Windows 95? Oh, it looks like it does." Well, you get the picture. Imagine this going on for the ENTIRE installation. I began wondering if this woman came with built-in O2 production and she didn't need to breath.

Anywho, I get through the installation in one piece. I get her internet set up (after dealing with some morons at her tech support...problems accessing internet, I called and asked if there was something funny going on, "Nope. Password works fine." I know the password works fine, why is Windows ME not accepting the internet password? "Fine, I'll reset the password." I thought you just said the password was fine...told him I tried telling it to bring up terminal window after dialing, and manually entering name & pwd, and it worked, until I hit "Continue", and he just said, "You aren't supposed to connect that way. The password works." ARGH! I wound up deleting her old connection, and recreating the connection and it worked fine...sept their DNS server was down, and couldn't go anywhere on the net).
A couple days later she called absolutely livid that her computer wasn't working the way it should be. It would always come up with the "Program not responding" when she shut down, one time it wouldn't wake up from Hibernation mode (Damn WinME for it's GD hibernation mode, she wasn't the only one with those problems...didn't Microsquash ask IBM WHY they got rid of Rapid Resume?). Blah, blah, blah...she went on about 10 minutes about the "End Task" problem, and the "Test pattern" problem over and over and over. Eventually, fed up with her nattering, I told her, "Well, bring it in."
After the nattering for another hour or so she finally decided to bring it in.
So, her daughter brought it in with a lovely note attached (I just LOVE notes).
"- Start up today with error message
- close for the first time correct
- CD Wizard has stop sign on it & couldn't use it yesterday today when I turn the machine on the stopsign was gone
- I left a cd in the cd player forgot to take it out/also couldn't disconnect the telephone cord so I took it with it
- Please give the machine an extra good look because I wouldn't want this to become a habit."
Ooo! An EXTRA fun note! So, I power the beast up. Hmm... No problems. I shut it down. Hmm... No problems...
I pop the front faceplate off and notice a purple goop on the front of the machine. She did a half-assed job of cleaning it up. I clean it up, flip it on its side, and notice a large goop spot on the bottom. Nice...I WONDER why the machine was causing problems.

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***the Beast
- I only came for the platypus soup

[Kyr0n]

I can relate, listen to this.

A good while back, when i first started working here, i had a customer come in wearing a really dirty moomoo that she wears every day. I say "Can i help you?" She walks over to me and says "Yes, i need a modem installed on my computer, my old one went out, and i havent had the internet for days" While she was saying this, she just kinda looked up towards the ceiling and stared off into nowhere. Then she placed a hand on my shoulder and said. "Its just been so terrible, i tell my husband that, but he doesnt believe me, you believe me dont you?" I say... "Uhm....riight did you bring your computer in?" She said no, that she wanted a house call.

I tried to get my boss not to send me out there, but i had to go anyway, so i packed up the things i needed and went to her house. The house is just on the edges of the city, and surrounded in grown up weeds, bushes, and trees. You couldnt even enter her house through any door but the garage, where she parks her car because of the brush grown up around it.

I went inside...she had about twenty something cats, liteterally. Plates from at least the last week or so were piled up around her computer table.

Again she went on and on about how terrible it was not to have the internet, and how she was going crazy without it while looking towards the sky again and staring off into nothing with a look on her face like someone just killed her family(i think she already was

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If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then lets get wasted and have the time of our lives.

[Skatman]

Eww,... purple hippy juice? thats nasty man,... and sometimes i wonder whats stopping me from becoming a store tech istead of a phone one

[This message has been edited by Skatman (edited March 21, 2001).]

[theBeast]

LOL! And somedays I wonder why I want out of retail tech! LOL!
I don't think it's as fun as it used to be. Before, customers would come with tributes...cash, chocolates, and wine. I haven't gotten any tributes in so long!

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***the Beast
- I only came for the platypus soup

[MacGyver]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by theBeast:
Ok, here's the short version of the story.... {much rambling deleted}</font>

Wow, that was the SHORT version? It's a good thing you don't post the long version or Scott would ask you to chip in for some extra storage space!

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"We're always behind industry standards" - Microsoft product manager Ed Suwanjindar

[theBeast]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by MacGyver:
Wow, that was the SHORT version? It's a good thing you don't post the long version or Scott would ask you to chip in for some extra storage space!

</font>

LOL! I've just got too much energy right now! I'm a rambling man. Hey, that would make a great song! I gotta get writing!

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***the Beast
- I only came for the platypus soup

[parning]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Skatman:
... and sometimes i wonder whats stopping me from becoming a store tech istead of a phone one.</font>

Go see my post titled <a href="http://forums.windrivers.com/cgi-bin/forum/Forum16/HTML/000903.html">"I feel dirty"</a> to see why!

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#include &lt;disclaimer.h&gt;: I didn't do it, nobody saw me, you can't prove anything, I swear I checked her ID first! Oh, and the opinions expressed herein are my own and not those of my employer.

[Skatman]

haha i read that and i fully understand the problems with phone techs,.. the worst i used to get was when i was booking hotel rooms for a major chian ..... with my luck i would get all the wierd calls that require going out to the back woods,... even worse here in utah id have to go out to the town that poligamists live in



[This message has been edited by Skatman (edited March 21, 2001).]

[pumpkinhead77]

I have said it before but I will say it again

99.9% of stupid people give the rest a bad name

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If it's not broken....Fix it!

[WebJedi_Master]

Hmm I think I may at one point had that lady as a customer for my internet service here in London.

It's scary the kind of people I used to deal with.

My own favorite is people would walk into the store, really anxious to buy a computer--they just "had to get a good system".

When asked what they wanted to use the system for, (to determine what was best for their budget)
they would always reply:

"I don't know. But I want a good system."

Or some variation therof. (ie something that's faster than what the neighbors have, etc... )



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